Submitted by perfectstorm5 on 09/03/2014.
I moved out this weekend after over 30 years of marriage, and over five years of arguing about his inability/unwillingness/denial about getting a job. It was the hardest thing i have ever done in my life. I know that in spite of the fact that i hope he will be motivated to lift himself out of a very dark place, that may not actually happen. The ecstasy comes from the peace and freedom that i have been craving for so long. If he still resists treatment, I don't think I'll go back, but I truly hope that this acts as a spark. There was definitely co-dependence in the status quo.
perfectstorm5, I have no
Submitted by dweeb on
perfectstorm5, I have no advice to offer you, I'd just like to say good for you, for getting through the hardest thing you've ever done!! Hope the worst is over for you.
I hope you get that spark, too!
Submitted by Standing on
I admire your courage and I hope that your husband will catch some of it!!
Take good care of yourself.
There is a time for every purpose under heaven
Submitted by I'm So Exhausted on
perfectstorm5,
I understand. Completely. I wish you every success in your endeavors.
The second greatest Gift!
Submitted by c ur self on
My separation was very positive...I hope you the same:)...While we lived together I could not see the forest for the trees...A time a part was very exposing for us both.
Precipice of something better or maybe worse, but needed change
Submitted by perfectstorm5 on
Thanks, all! I feel so fortunate to have the support of my family(and my husband's family) and friends. I know that many of you are in a situation where the problems are more invisible to outsiders, and that can be tough. Everyone who knows my husband says that he is a great guy who needs to get some help. My husband now says that he "intends" to get help, but in spite of a promising referral, he made one phone call, got the initial paperwork, lost it immediately, and is too embarrassed to call back. I know that his intentions are good, but I needed to remove myself from the constant inaction. I am hoping for some of the clarity that you got c ur self, but I am also worried that he may never forgive me for leaving.
Some gifts aren't wrapped with pretty paper and bows....
Submitted by c ur self on
Well, you can't do anything about his heart...But, if your leaving forces him to grow up, see himself, deal with his own life issues....It will be the greatest gift you could offer.
great timing
Submitted by perfectstorm5 on
Thanks, c ur self!! I needed to hear that today.