Husband informs me last night that someone screwed up something at work and they need to rebuild the whole thing by Monday so everyone is to work both Sat/Sun. And not only Sat/Sun, but 2nd shift and most likely a 12 hour shift so that means he'll be working from 1PM to 1AM. He is also working 2nd shift today, most likely until 1AM. It will be another clean and get things done weekend just like 2 weeks ago when he was gone for the race weekend. And I like the fact that it's 12 hours AND 2nd shift because it means he isn't leaving at 4AM on Saturday morning and working until 11AM or something because then I feel that I have to get up just as early to get things done before he gets home. This way I can be leisurely until he leaves and then get busy doing whatever. He'll be at work when I get home tonight too so I can stop and do some shopping on my way home or go to the library without him pitching a fit because I'm an hour later than usual! However it may also turn into a case of he goes in at 1PM but then is home by 6PM for whatever reason. That's one thing I hate is that sometimes he just shows up at home at random times because there wasn't a enough work or everyone else was leaving so he did too. I hate it when I am watching some cheesy show and making some experimental dinner that only I would watch and eat (and I'm only watching and eating it because he isn't home or I'd catch flak for it!) and then he surprisingly walks through the front door and the first thing out of his mouth is "WHY are you watching THAT?" and "WHAT is that smell?"
I skipped out on an after work function earlier this week because I always get the cold shoulder from him when I go to these after work and don't get home until 8 PM or so. After work functions usually involve drinks and apps and I think he just gets upset that I'm doing it without him or that I might have too much to drink so I have declined to go to quite a few simply because I don't want him mad at me. If he worked 2nd shift all the time then I could go to these and he wouldn't be any the wiser.
Why is it I'm so much happier when I can do stuff without him being around? I am actually excited that I can walk through the front door tonight whenever I want and eat whatever I want and watch whatever I want without him making fun of what I'm watching, criticize me on what I'm eating or asking where I've been!
I understand!
Submitted by Second Chances on
Mapper, I totally get it. Me too. A couple weeks ago BF left the house in a snit one morning - after I pressed him about his lack of paying any household bills - and although I was initially pissed that he walked out mid-discussion, muttering that he would just "go live in his car" <sigh>, I had a fabulous day. I was more productive than I had been in weeks. And I wasn't too thrilled to see him when he arrived back home late that evening.
I'm glad you will have this peaceful, productive weekend for yourself. Enjoy! But yet it is sad that you feel more relaxed, more happy (?) when your husband, the man who is supposed to be your life "partner" is NOT there. Definitely a statement, eh? Hang in there!
Then last night....
Submitted by Mapper (not verified) on
He worked an 11 hour day yesterday and I beat him home by about a 1/2 hour. I haven't worked at home for about 9 months now so I forgot what he is like when he gets home from work, especially a long day of work. Even though he doesn't say it it's pretty much "Don't talk to me or ask me to do anything or even ask me any questions. I need 30 minutes to decompress." So I let him do his thing on the computer and then he comes out on the couch and says what's for dinner, leftovers or ordering out?" I ask "What would you prefer?" and he says with an eye roll "I don't care." So I say leftovers. He then goes and takes a shower and comes back out 20 minutes later and says "So what's for dinner?" I assumed he wasn't thrilled with the idea of leftovers even though he didn't say that, so I say "Okay lets order out." I then ask if he wants Thai or pizza to which I get the reply "You pick". Okay I say pizza. I go to order it online and ask him what he wants on it and he's getting all frustrated and says "You just pick it okay. I have no decision making capabilities right now." Well I kind of want your input so I don't get something you don't like! Then he says "I'll just be like you. Whenever I cook you don't care what I make just as long as someone else is doing it". THAT pissed me off! Why are you being so snide with me? Because you worked an 11 hour day and I should kiss your feet? Even though you have taken days and weeks off without pay over the past few months and lied to me about it and can't pay any of the bills? Now one day of hard work and you are just so wiped and totally incapable of even making a decision? I was so riled up I said to him after his comment "Well I'll be just like you. Whenever I pay all the bills you don't care just as long as someone else is doing it!" That shut him up! Oh and he had no input on the pizza when I was ordering it online but the moment I hit the send button he goes "Did you get it well done and square cut?" Yes I did. It would have been nice if you would have asked me that BEFORE I hit send!