Pre-reading
Optimizing ADHD Treatment E-book
Articles of interest
Welcome video
Session 1 – OPTIMIZING ADHD TREATMENT
- Differences between you
- Understanding your partner’s experience in the relationship
- Treatment effect size
- Optimizing treatment and common questions
Bonus video: More on Medications
Treatment worksheets and setting target symptoms
Article on medications
Q&As to answer treatment questions
Submit your own questions for professionals to answer
Session 2 – THREE IMPORTANT PATTERNS IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP
- Pattern 1 – Misinterpretation of ADHD symptoms
- Pattern 2 – Symptom/response/response
- Unproductive responses to each other vs. finding productive responses
- Introduction to the idea of the ‘Intentional Relationship’
- Pattern 3 - Parent-Child Dynamics - what it is and why it's there
Mindfulness resources
Sleep improvement worksheet
Information on stress and health
Session 3 – BOUNDARIES THAT MOVE YOU AWAY FROM PARENT-CHILD DYNAMICS; MOVING PAST ANGER AND DENIAL
- Using boundaries to move away from Parent-Chlld Dynamics and strengthen your relationship
- Key anger issues
- The inevitability of anger
- Moving past denial and defensiveness
Anger worksheet
Session 4 - DEALING WITH STRONG EMOTIONS IN ADHD-IMPACTED RELATIONSHIPS
- The biology of emotional volatility in ADHD
- Methods of addressing strong emotions that research suggests work
- The underpinnings of strong emotions in non-ADHD partners
- Addressing emotions in non-ADHD partners
- Does your partner have an obligation to help you address your emotional issues?
- Live questions catch up
Emotions and ADHD reading
Session 5 – THE HEALING PROCESS; COMMUNICATION STRATEGIES THAT WORK
- The three stages of healing
- Learning conversations
- Verbal cues
- Learning how to fight / “good fights”
- Moving from negative/negative fights to positive/positive through “neutral”
- Repair techniques
- Apologies
- Validation vs. invalidation
Validation tracking worksheet to understand your own validation patterns
Learning Conversation do's and don'ts
Emotions and actions wheel to use in Learning Conversations
Session 6 – GETTING AWAY FROM FIGHTS AND CHORE WARS
- Specific anger situations and how to get away from them
- Gottman’s Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse
- Resolvable issues vs. unresolvable issues and what to do with each
- Shame and avoidance
- Chore Wars – what they are, and how to improve in this area
- Identifying maternal/paternal gatekeeping
- Setting measurable goals
Chore score worksheet to help assess options for diminishing chore wars
Optional chapter 5 in Couple’s Guide to Thriving with ADHD (chore wars)
BONUS SESSION - GETTING BETTER ORGANIZED WITH ADHD
- The emotional issues with organizing
- Overarching strategies that work with the way the ADHD brain functions
- Ideas that work
Session 7 – DIFFICULT TO UNDERSTAND BEHAVIORS: THE SKINNY ON LYING, AFFAIRS, PORNOGRAPHY, AND MORE
- Lying - what's going on?
- Financial lying
- Job loss and work issues
- ‘Better than you’
- Pornography
- Affairs
Articles on lying and the science of fear
Resources
Session 8 – REBUILDING TRUST; THE SCIENCE OF FINDING JOY IN YOUR ADHD-IMPACTED RELATIONSHIP
- Understanding 'ghosts'
- Appreciating ADHD
- Rebuilding trust
- The science of finding joy together (part 1)
- Resources for continuing your progress
Article on the gifts of ADHD
Session 9 – INTIMACY, SEX AND DESIRE; RECAP OF KEY TAKEAWAYS; NEXT STEPS
- The science of finding joy together (part 2)
- The importance of attending
- What is conflict intimacy, and why is it important?
- Research on how couples describe intimacy
- Building intimacy outside the bedroom
Set one goal for change, and create plan
Date for telling partner what you love about him/her