So I have noticed a pattern. Each time I have sex with my ADHD husband, he treats me horribly afterwards and the next day. I have reached out to other spouses of partners with ADHD and they experience this also. Why does this happen? As soon as I let myself be vulnerable he gives me this treatment in return (which makes me feel like a piece of trash) and expects me bounce back emotionally and of course physically. Why would anyone want to continue this cycle and have sex only to be treated this way? This is why I do not like to have sex with him, not because of other ADHD symptoms. I keep reading not to take things personally, but this one behavior I cannot push aside and ignore. I deserve love and respect after I allow myself to connect with him. I can find lots info about hyper-sex drive and everything else but I can't find any information on this anywhere.
After intimacy treatment
Submitted by stephanie711 on 02/22/2015.
Hi Stephanie711
Submitted by c ur self on
I don't think that has anything to do with adhd...First I would say to you...Talk to him about specific words or actions that make you feel unappreciated and unloved...Your willingness to take care of his physical and emotional needs is right, and it's your responsibility. So try not to let this negative behavior you feel directed at you...get intertwined with your faithfulness as his wife...You will never answer for him, But, you will answer for you....
I would tell him his words and actions (if that's what your dealing with) are unkind and he needs to deal with his own issues...Tell him that his behavior is something you are not going to be in fellowship with. Then walk away, do not make it your problem, because it's not. Do not let his behavior define you.
One of the most common theme's I see on this forum, and I've experienced in my own life is all the baggage we collect when we do not take reality at face value.
Which leads to one of the biggest Illusions (mind traps) a person can get sucked into...Thinking they can by their efforts (emotionally, psychologically or even physically) make a relationship happen....You and I will never force someone to love us...
Also, just because someone isn't loving us like we want them to...Doesn't mean they are not doing all they may be capable of...