So I was out of state visiting my Mom for a week and just got back yesterday. H did not go with me. On the 3rd day of my visit I receive a call from H. I did not have my phone on me at the time and didn't get the voice mail until the next morning. I noted the time he called as 9PM on a Saturday night. I listen to it and he says "Can you PLEASE not empty my trash in the garage? I had a part for my motorcycle sitting on top of the garbage can and it had fallen in. I normally wouldn't have left it there but seeing as how the trash wasn't full I didn't see it as a problem. I just spent 2 hours looking for that part and then it dawned on me where it was and now it's gone. Sorry to be a bummer, but (sigh) I'll just have to buy a new part."
Okay am I crazy or is this totally NOT my fault?! A part you need is IN THE GARBAGE, not on top of the garbage, but IN THE GARBAGE and you just left it there? He hadn't touched his bike in 3 months and I took out that garbage almost a month ago and he is just now noticing it? And why oh why did that require a call to me at 9PM on a Saturday night just to make me feel bad about throwing it out? Was anything going to be accomplished by that? It's gone, I'm 2000 miles away and not back for another 4 days. You couldn't have brought this up on my return? So of course me feeling bad about it gave him my credit card number and told him to buy another one. He responds back that it's not a big deal and it's only $50 and he had already purchased it. I transferred him $50 anyways. Only $50 and he felt he needed to make a big deal about it. You'd think I trashed a $1000 part! Then I get home last night and he shows me the bike and it's all done. So you could have done all this, replaced the part and I wouldn't have been any the wiser as to what happened but you just had to make me feel bad about it. And what I don't understand is that he new the part had been in the trash and saw that the trash was now empty but still took 2 hours to look for it? If you knew it was gone then why did you spend all that time looking for it?
I hear you, it's a no-win
Submitted by copingSAH on
I hear you, it's a no-win situation. If we say anything, we anger them. If we don't say anything, we're guilty of doing wrong.
When I withdraw money: 1) he gets a notification on his phone; 2) I text him to let him know how much and for what; 3) details of it shows up online when he logs onto his account a few times a day. 4) I will print out the transaction details and leave it in the usual spot.
Yet as soon as he starts balancing his checkbook, he still asks me how much I took out.
I just don't understand it. I feel so disoriented and micromanaged. Why do I deserve to be grilled when he has gone to all those lengths to keep tabs on me and having to report to him for every transaction?