ADHD, Separation how to stop from divorce?
This is my first post. I read through so many others, and it is nice to find a place where I may learn from so many other's experiences.
This is my first post. I read through so many others, and it is nice to find a place where I may learn from so many other's experiences.
I would really like to hear from non-ADD spouses who experience what I call "meltdowns" from their ADD wives or husbands. Actually, uncontrolled nuclear fission culminating in a nuclear explosion is the better analogy. I've seen the phrase "walking on eggshells" throughout this site. That's how I live. Actually, it's more like walking through a minefield. In talking with my wife, I know that at any moment she may take something I say the wrong way, or take it personally, or "mis hear" what I say ("hear" me say things I didn't actually say - scary!) and then fly into a rage. The insult
I have been in treatment for peri-menapause using natural hormones, vitamins and lifestyle changes while also experiencing a significant increase in my ADHD symptoms for the last 4 years. Symptoms have included much more distractibility, memory loss and forgetfullness, trouble recalling names and mild depression. Have been taking Concerta with vague results, and now trying a trial of Amantadine after reading "Delivered from Distraction".
I truly have come to the end of my rope.
I have tried for seven years to get my husband to seek help for his ADD. Despite a psychiatrit's diagnosis, he believes he is "managing " just fine. I have tried the soft sell. I have tried the hard sell. I have tried the ultimatum. I was diagnosed with ADD 5 years ago and have done pretty well on medication along with therapy. My husband says, "Just because you have ADD, doesn't mean that I do."
Melissa Just a thought. I know that this is a forum for adults but I was wondering if because this forum is so helpful for adults could you have a forum for children of Adhd. I have a son with Adhd/Odd and I think his older brother had a mild case of Adhd. I think it would be so helpful as I have been searching for a forum and not really finding something useful. Any suggestions??? life with a special needs kid can be hard as well. Thanks for any help....
We're a blended family. My partner with ADD and his two girls (12 and 17) and me and my son (14) and daughter (16) moved in together about 6 months ago. The children get on really well, we all do. Lately though my partner has been very strict on my son - and is driving my son crazy - he has very high expectations of my son and my son can't do eneough to please him. My son up until now has done everything he has been able to to be understanding about my partner's ADD, but he has had enough and wants to move out.
This post is intended as a response to a post by "Tom T", in which an ADHD husband is confused about why his wife has left him. It is also addressed to all the ADHD spouses who still remain clueless about the impacts of the ADHD on their relationships, and are inadvertently driving their spouses to leave them. Tom is confused by his wife's leaving because asserts he is a good person and thought the marriage was good.
To tom:
I am new to this site and am wavering between relief (that I'm not the only one going through this and that I'm NOT crazy) and despair (that people with many more years of marriage under their belts are continuing to struggle).
Can anyone recommend a reasonably affordable coach? My husband is doing a lot of that "trying but not changing" stuff that Melissa talked about recently. I think coaching would help a lot, and my husband agrees - but keeps balking at the price. Phone and email contact would be fine - ideal, actually.
My husband has begun the process of getting a diagnosis. I'm a little confused and would love some enlightenment. His primary care physician saw him, then asked to also see me. After asking a lot of questions, he said he didn't have a problem putting him on a low dose of ritalin and checking back in 4 weeks.