Recent forum posts (all topics)

Lately, I'm beginning to see an abject "loser" mentality in my ADHD partner. As if all that life is, is a series of losses. And every mistake, failure, mishap in the past, is dictating his future. He is convinced he is doomed 60-70% of the days I've been with him. And I am so. exhausted. of his mentality. Where everything apparently sucks, is disappointing, is underwhelming and not good enough. It makes me feel like nothing, nothing at all, will make him happy, joyful, positive or hopeful. And if it does, it will last 30 seconds. And then disappear into thin air.

Tonight we were talking about politics for an hour laying in bed and from time to time he had outburst of energy he was laying down relaxed then sitting up with excitement and big eyes, we could be talking about a single topic and he ends up on a different one then zones out, I reminded him to try to lay down with me while we were talking and he did his best, after we were done talking he asked if we could do research and I felt overwhelmed, I felt extremely drained after trying to keep up through the conversation and Bringing him back to the topic every single time he railed off, I’ve had

After experiencing my own mind's workings...And watching my wife's mind work out it's reality, (Along with all the years of study and sharing with others in life, and here for the past nearly 8 years) I have no problem accepting the great strain that does manifest when two people try to relate and come together in a unified state...(Healthy attachments)....

Think of the things we face in trying to get there.....

1) Priorites

2) Levels of concern about any given subject

3) Nurture

4) Nature

5) Education

Trying to find ways to help my partner be more aware of how his adhd impacts our marriage and wondering if anyone ever tried going through this site with their spouse and spent a little bit of time a day to digest some or this information together. Desperate to find ways in how we can improve our homelife... we don't fight often but when we do it's terrible and in the past it was way worse. I've adjusted my expectations which has helped but I think there's a lot of work that needs to happen on his end and I'm looking to leverage this source amongst others.

Hello! 

Hi Everyone, 

I'm sad to find you all here and also relieved. My husband for years claimed he had ADHD but unfortunately I was not educated on the symptoms and assumed that he did not. I've read everyone's posts and it's like reading your life through the lens of so many other people. We only verified this diagnosis when my son was recently diagnosed with AdHD (inattentive) this past 2 months in middle school and now that we know what he has then it validates my husband's diagnosis... reading about adult adhd checks off everything we've encountered in 14 Year of marriage.

My husband and I are both ADHD diagnosed and treated. He has much more severe symptoms than I do that are moderately helped by high doses of Ritalin, except when he forgets. I do pretty well on adderrall- keeps me calm and not as spacey as without it.

My wife of 14 years was diagnosed with ADHD about 9 months ago.  Undoubtedly it's a familiar story for many here: impulsive spending, stopped working, parent/child relationship, etc. 

After her diagnosis things were supposed to improve; the medication would help and she would get the tools to change her life.  It hasn't happened and instead she hyper focuses on things she wants to do to the detriment of all others (chores, children, etc.).  

I'm stepping out on a limb here as I never wrote on a forum.  Too much to say, but I'm a 38 yr old male with a wife and 8 yr old son. I "divorced" my entire family, have no one in my life from the first 26 yrs of my life, and have no friends close enough to reach out to. I'm the one with ADHD and my wife is a therapist and complete opposite of ADHD. My son has it as well, we're both medicated and I'm in weekly talk therapy.

Hi! I am new to this community!

My husband has recently been diagnosed with ADHD and everything has clicked into place. We have a typical ADHD marriage with all the issues. Now we know this I have been reading all the articles and books, listening to all the podcasts, joined a support group and have been looking for a couples therapist.