Recent forum posts (all topics)

I'm thinking about this topic today more than usual because this would have been my 33rd wedding anniversary, if the marriage had not ended (by divorce, two years ago).  My ex has, it seemed, always showed more interest in communicating and sharing with and supporting women who aren't me.  You don't know me and you don't know him, so you can't tell me why this is, but I'm wondering what others whose spouses or partners have ADHD have experienced in this realm.  I don't necessarily think this is an ADHD thing.  My ex has lots of other issues that could explain this, including (maybe) that he

Hello, this is the first time I posted on here and I think my marriage is at the most critical point right now, the tipping point, and I am unsure of which way it will fall.

Recently, our teenage son said he knew my wife hid his portable game system in her locked drawer and he could not get to it.  Last night, she opened the drawer (she says it was locked) and found it missing.  This is the same drawer where she keeps sex toys.  We have file cabinets with locks in our bedroom precisely because both our son and our daughter routinely go into our room without permission and look through our dressers and under the bed.  I keep medications in the locked drawer next to my side of the bed.

This is my first time posting, but I have been visiting this site for about a year.  My husband stopped taking his ADD medicine several months ago.  He also has sleep apnea and won't use his equipment at night.  According to him, both these things are my fault.  He also tells me I'm the reason he lies.  Things have been horrible lately, especially when it comes to our kids.  They don't see his constant lies and I'm the "mean and bad" parent because I ask them to do chores.  In front of me, he tells both kids (11 and 14) that they don't need to do what I ask and that I should do it myself. 

Same issues as usual were raised, things that I have been telling him have been getting worse: forgetting things, time management, organization and communication. Our marriage has been horrible, I am miserable. These things plus his negative attitude have taken a major toll but he had told me that - despite my concerns that it would affect his work as well - things were find at work and his job was safe. It wasn’t. He knew for a while and he lied. 

I am tired. Exhausted. 

This is my first time posting here though I have been reading every word for the last several weeks since finding this site. I am an American who has been living and working in England for 10+ years. I have been married for 17 years with a woman who had undiagnosed ADD (until diagnosed 2+ yrs. ago) and we have a 15 yo daughter....... Just turned 60 this last weekend and sadly, did not feel like celebrating the milestone at all.

After it's all said and done, I feel so sad and alone.

It feels like the only way I can get some emotional needs met is if I "give in" and accept that my husband is a slave laborer, and messy and we will never get out of this house because he won't get rid of his crap nor will he take care of his bills.  He will never plan anything.... well you all know the drill.

In other words to get some companionship, I need to accept all these irritating bits.

I am going to really brush over most of the details because, quite frankly, they have been repeated a million times on this forum from what i have read.  I am the male adhd spouse in a 27 year relationship with 2 great kids.  Our relationship took a real nose dive about 4 years ago as i sunk into a depression that i did not see or understand.  I detached from my wife and my kids a lot.  I didn't know that i was having difficulty dealing with adhd.  I knew i had it when i was a child but never understood what it really was, besides the major hyperactivity i had growing up.  That passed in my