Recent forum posts (all topics)

I'm the non-ADD spouse who's been married for almost 7 years.  We have 2 beautiful children and in the midst of another 'crisis' I decided to explore another avenue than I had previously.  Among other things, my husband has the tendency to 'email' and/or converse with women from his past purely to get the attention that I am obviously not giving him.  This has been an issue since the 1st year of our marriage.  I've been on this 'changing what I can control' kick since February of this year.  Realizing that I can only control me.  I can not control my husbands behaviors, a

My DH and I started out arguing last night, but ended up with a new understanding.  I wish we did not have to fight to get to the gold nugget, but alas, that is just the way it works sometimes.  I have been working really hard in the last week or so (well okay, with a few setbacks along the way).  But my DH has not mentioned noticing anything.  I was beginning to think that if I am working as hard as I can and he doesn't even notice, am I EVER going to make any progress (with him)?!

I read that ADHDers are typically night owls and their brains don't 'wake up' until 10pm or so.  This has aways been the case for me and it seems like no matter what I do I cannot stick to anything that's early in the morning.  I struggle to get through all the household routines and have everything clean and put away by 11pm and have to get up at 7, so I try to get to bed by 11 or 11:30, but typically it's midnight before I can get everything done (and stop puttering around with the computer).  So the only time I can have any 'me' time for exercise or anything without my kids on top of m

I am new to this site but glad I found it. I am 30 years old, married for almost 6 years. We have two small children (3 and 8 months) together and he's in Grad school. We've been to counseling in the past and "worked" on some things we were having difficulties in. Because he is in grad school, in archeology, he has spent many weeks away doing research. At times when he has been away he has been so hyper-focused on his work he has not called to check in on us, or has not picked up the phone when we try to call him over 9 hour or so periods.

Hi - I just read the sample chapters.  I do have a question about being "normal."  I read that I as the non-add souse need to realize that there is nothing broken or not normal about their add spouse. It seems that I need to take the leap to truly understand that his way of doing life and perceiving the world is not of lesser value than my "normal" ways. I fully admit I have a hard time at this. I don't think it is normal to not keep a job or even look for one. I don't think it is normal to use bank overdrafts as a valid means of money.

My husband and I have been together 5 years.  He was diagnosed with ADD at 15.  He was on Concerta for a time and said that the doctor adjusted the dosage a couple times, my husband admits that the medication "helped a little" but chronic insomnia led my husband to just stop taking the medication.  His family lived in Singapore at the time.  His father is Asian Indian and his mother is Ukrainian, so their views of medication, therapy and medical practices are different than Americans.  They never got him therapy or anything else.  Just medication and when my husband stopped, they didn't p

I have recently moved back in with my husband after a 1 year separation.  We've been married for 13 years and don't have kids.  He's very high functioning ADD and was diagnosed last year.  Since I've known him for 25 years, I always knew he had extraordinary struggles with procrastination, closure and deadlines, but I didn't really understand it was because of the way his brain worked until the past year or so.

I have noticed that when the pills my husband is taking for his ADD wear off (when it is about time for another dose) his ADD returns worse than ever. Perhaps, I am now used to the new improved person and what I'm seeing is the way he was previous to taking the pills.  It really does seem like his ADD is worse than ever without the pills, but drastically improved while the pills are in effect.  Has anyone else noticed this about their spouse?