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It's so heartbreaking to read around this forum, a lot of happiness and good things too of course, but a lot of sadness. I always feel a little numb and I ended up writing this. It's quite long and I don't expect anyone to read through it but maybe it can help someone somewhere. I'm a wife married to the love of my life, but in our case I am the one with ADD, "ruining everything".

"Dear my husband, I'm sorry I couldn't do your laundry"

Dear my husband,

I have a wife that needs help but will not seek it. She is 38 and has a generational history with ADD and ADHD. Mom, Brother,Uncle etc. She is always yelling at me and the kids and cannot complete any task around the house with out it talking hours (sometimes days) and constant reminding by me... which she hates with a passion. I try picking up after her but I feel its not solving the problem but instead making me more resentful for having to pick up after her.

Hi,

I have been diagnosed with adult ADD for several years now. My wife often calls me out for staring at other women, which she finds offensive and hurtful.  In many cases, I am completely and totally unaware that I have been staring.  I frequently accused her of making it up, which engendered even more hurt feelings and inevitably an argument. I now accept that it does happen, and she has noticed that I also occasionally stare at men, children, animals, or inanimate objects.

I want to address the anger and verbal abuse with my ADHD spouse.   Its out of control and I feel im living on egg shells.  I cant deal with the bipolar extreme ups then bam youre being verbally abused  I want us to get help together so I can learn to understand ADHD personality and adjust things I do to help.   I want him to understand the affect it has on me and for him to take responsibility to controll his own anger Let me set the stage of our relationship and a describe typical evenings.   Married 7  years My ADHD husband is Irish and a Scorpio.

Just wanted to post a finding of mine over the weekend.  Not sure but I believe it was published in 1994 its is called Answers to Distraction by Edward Hallowell M.D. and John J Ratey, M.D. This book does cover both children and adults with ADD.  The book is all answers to frequently asked questions about ADD. 

I was just wondering if there is anyone on this forum who is/has a spouse that is taking Omega-3 for their ADHD?

**I just found an iPhone app called "Home Routine". It is an app that has repeatable to-do lists for household tasks, can be separated into 'morning', 'afternoon', and 'evening' task lists that you can edit/personalise - and they reset each day so you never have to get overwhelmed writing daily to-do lists for the everyday routines. It also has the space for weekly tasks and, if you want to add one, monthly tasks...

My husband and I have been separated for about 4 months now.  I am feeling so hopeless after 12 years of marriage.  We have struggled most of those years.  Since our separation, I have found information on adult ADHD and feel as though he could be a poster child for it.  I have asked him to make an appointment for an evaluation, which he did for next month.  I continue to feel disappointment and hopelessness as I continue to try to trust his word and feel let down each time.  He thinks that I only focus on the things he does wrong.  I just feel like I've ridden a roller coaster for 12 yrs