Hey all. I will BOLD relevant info for the skim readers. Keen for help from non ADHD and ADHD participants.
Currently reading "The Couple's guide to Thriving with ADHD" by Melissa Orlov & Nancie Kohlenberger
I am not married to my partner but I have severely been rubbing her the wrong way with this reoccurring issue. I am a 27 year old male and she is a 21 year old woman for reference.
I'm the non-ADHD spouse. A little backstory, we've been married for two years and I've dealt with a lot of his impulsiveness, rage, mood swings, and general irresponsibility. These things caused me to create unhealthy coping mechanisms and dynamics and earlier this year our relationship was pure chaos. So we went to counseling and things started to get better. But recently things are crazy again.
My husband is diagnosed with ADHD. I do not have it. I would very much appreciate advice on this:
I had been feeling very dragged out and lightheaded last week. On Friday, I went to an urgent care facility thinking it might be COVID. They did do a swab, but they were concerned it was heart related and did an EKG. That was OK, but they told me to go to the ER to make sure it wasn't a heart problem that they could not detect. After several hours hooked up to monitors, a blood test, a strep test, and a urine sample, they told me there was nothing physically wrong with me. The diagnoses was stress--the doctor said that stress could be interrupting my sleep.
Looking for perspectives form other families dealing with similar situations.
Hey Yall, I'm a non, married 40 years to a non-diagnosed, untreated ADHD that in my view is severe. I've been studying books, reading blogs, lurking around here and learning more and more. Ruling out certain "tries" that aren't effective, observing and attempting to keep my sanity. Sometimes I wonder if I have dementia or alzheimers or is the chaos of a marriage partner with this enough to make you doubt your own sanity or cause the massive stress that gives chronic brain fog? ok I'm rambling sorry. My question here now is this: How do I approach the "naming" of these issues i.e.
Listened to an interesting session last night - the first of the series - and was delighted to hear that it's important to think about what the top few issues you see in your ADHD partner before deciding on the right medication. I've always been curious about this and I feel like a lot of docs and therapists who don't know ADHD/ADHD relationships well might not prescribe as effectively as they could.
Dr. Barkley gave a good presentation on how adult ADHD is different then childhood ADHD and how it should be diagnosed.
You may have read my posts on my daughter being admitted to psychiatric hospitals in July and August. Now, she has been admitted once again--this time at her own request. She told us about some very disturbing obsessive thoughts, including walking into fire and taking large doses of Tylenol. She also said she was afraid of hurting herself. I was in the ER from 9pm Wednesday to 5:00pm Thursday.
My wife was trying to get me to not have her admitted. But the things she had said were so disturbing that I felt there was no choice.
I'm not even angry or frustrated anymore, just dead and numb inside...
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The ADHD Effect on Marriage was listed in Huff Post as a top book that therapists suggest all couples should read.
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