Recent forum posts (all topics)

Emotional Maturity & the Silent Treatment

This week I am online learning by myself about emotional intelligence and maturity.  MINE!  It seems to me that when I was young, I had a youthful emotional maturity.  I stood on solid ground. After living with H all these years, I see that I have bent myself to accommodate him and his ways and I had become emotionally immature too and a little crazy.  I brought myself down to his level to not seem to act "superior or motherly or stodgy or 'better than' ".  In other words, I was putting myself on his level. I tried fighting fire with fire.

Freaking out pretty much FIRST POST

Married 40 years, just waking up to this issue. I'm a non-ADHD wife with an adorable, adoring-loving ADHD husband who would throw himself in front of a train for me. He is so wonderful in MANY ways. Super smart, charming to the utmost, can fix absolutely anything except a coffee maker haha and has lived his whole live avoiding the pain of a sick, traumatic childhood using his extraverted salesy joking personality. When we are "outside" our day to day problems, we have fun, we laugh together until we hurt, it just doesn't get any better. But......

Counting my blessings.....

Hi all...I just wanted to say that things are going well....I've been experiencing great peace for the most part....My wife approached me about a month or so ago...She looked me in the eyes (like she has never done before) and told me that she knows she needs to change, and that she was making changes...She's been much more aware and in control of her emotions (work in progress of course)...The main thing is she is taking ownership a little better, and that denial/blame attitude has subsided quiet a bit....Praise the Lord!...The conflict has subsided due to acceptance...She knows I don't tr

What is it like. (To Have ADHD)

Today I did the most challenging thing in my life. I have never had an anxiety attack, but if this is one, I do not want to ever experience it again.

The word says for the spirit of heaviness, put on the garment of praise. My garment is worn of the numerous times I clothe myself. If this is heaviness, I need more of God and praise. What a fantastic feeling if God surrounds us with His full presence, not a half or part presence. A full unconditional presence. 

My Walkaway Movement

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Thank you to everyone for sharing their personal stories.  I believe I am exactly where many of you have been, but I have mentally and emotionally reached the end of my journey with my ADHD husband.

I have for way too long made excuses for my partner and his behavior. I recently came to the realization that life is short and passing me by.

My story began about 4 1/2 years ago, when at the age of 40 I made the decision to continue in my current relationship, despite the constant roller coaster of ups and downs.

Update

A lot has changed! I am living by myself and I love it. I miss having my children live with me...they are staying with their dads full time for now bc I am considered an essential employee and I go to work Monday through Saturday. The girls and I get together 3 to 4 times a week and go for a walk or eat take out with my parents (we sit 6 feet apart outside on my parents' deck.) 

Still Struggling Against Things Impulsively Said

It's been nearly two years since my marriage melted down. Heavy drink was my ex's last straw away from sanity and suddenly he wanted to open our 13 year marriage. Well, he had been pursuing other women before asking but in his impulsive flurry to get approval for this alternative lifestyle. When I said no thanks I'd rather divorce, he had a three month alcohol fueled temper tantrum. I know now he was acting out, depressed, and without the executive functioning to know better at the moment. 

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