Recent forum posts (all topics)

New here. I've decided to separate, now he's all over me again!

I need advice please, or just an ear from those of you who love your adhd spouse, but for your own sanity and possibility of a peaceful life, have decided to leave. After 12 years of being together, and about 7 years of me researching and focusing on adhd and the roll it plays (the BIG ROLE) and sharing with my husband (he is diagnosed Add and Odd, as is his son)  I can't take it anymore.  His symptoms are absolutely textbook. Thankfully he does not have the violent rages, he is generally a good and sweet man.

Where Do I Go From Here

I've been silently reading posts on here for almost a year now. I've been trying to hold out from posting because I know my situation is extreme but I am truly at a loss right now. My husband told me he has ADHD from day 1. He's never been medicated since his mom didn't want him to be a "pill popper" (a sentiment he agrees with strongly). I'm 19, he's 20. He's in the military, I'm a full time student.
 

ADHD spouse. Offering a different POV

Hello all. ADHD spouse here. My challenges have destroyed my marriage, and my life. My wife is leaving and taking our 3 kids with her. When we talked she told me about how she couldn't trust me anymore because of all the times before, that I said I'd do this better or do that better and whatever efforts I had put forward weren't enough or didn't last. I just hope all of you understand that when you say you're done, and your spouse says they'll do better, it's BECAUSE they care about you and don't want to lose you. And in that moment, them doing better is all they want in the world.

Not using calendar equals taking it out on me while I am working at home

I have been telling my wife for weeks that she has not been keeping track of appointments on our shared calendar or her own calendar.  For example, just before the stay at home period started, she had made an appointment with our couples counselor and forgot to tell me about it.  I stopped off at the drug store on the way home to find her not there.  Our daughter thought she was at a store.  When she got back, I THEN found out that there had been a couples appointment that i would have needed to drive to immediately after work in order to make it.  Worse still, she forgot about the appointm

How can I move past the hurt and anger?

I feel very stuck. There has been so much long lasting hurt and anger, caused by actions that continue. I have no idea how to summon up the inclination to change myself as part of the process to save our marriage. I really need to see changes in my ADHD partner first to move forward. I realize this isn't how I should be approaching things, it's just so difficult. How can I shift my mindset and move past the hurt and anger?

Meditation on Easter Sunday

I had at first spewed out some unhappy thoughts here which is not what we need today. Then I replaced it with this:

I will be meditating and prayerful today toward acceptance and strength and wholeness during our time of separateness this Easter Sunday.

 

Do you have a personal method of calming and enjoying being by yourself, feeling sure-footed or just not alone?

Do you remember a small activity that gave you the quiet feeling of celebrating "just being"?

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