Recent forum posts (all topics)

I admit, if I had known anything at all about adult ADHD in my husband, prior to marrying him I would have researched and known what I was in for, and surely headed for the hills!

But I didn't. I had no idea that my dh had been diagnosed as a child, and has lived his entire adult life not even acknowledging he still has it, and didn't tell me anything. I was so unfamiliar with ADHD, except that children are diagnosed for this or ADD, thought they outgrew it.

I ask myself,  "What do you want?"  I can never put my finger on this question to myself - of what do I want for myself.  I realize that I have not "wanted" for decades.  OR better said, I WANTED my family to feel taken care of and to have a nice home and a loving family.  THAT is what I wanted.  I worked like crazy and sacrificed gladly.  I was empathic and saw my role in life as someone who supported my husband and 2 sons to achieve in what THEY wanted for themselves.  I supported my husband even more than my sons toward what HE wanted and with what HE could handle.

Greetings,

Hello,

Please  find below the last email I sent to my husband, we are married for 4 years with a 3 years old beautiful girl. He also has PTSD , anxiety and sometimes panic attacks, it is surreal, I have been trying for my daughter, but I am seriously thinking about leaving this relationship. 

He just started adderall I am not sure why it is taking a while to work, I had really 3 days in a month!

Is there anybody to give me some hope that things can get better with the right medicine? 

I have ADHD, diagnosed for over 10 years.  I take medication - I also have lupus.  These two things combined along with my general inability to fix anything are destroying my marriage. My husband is tired of me - and rightfully so.  We are living apart for the 2nd time, after being married 5 years.  We have 6 children between us, but none together.  I can't get it together.  He is tired of waiting for me to change.  Tired of my lack of follow through.  Tired.  I'm not suicidal, but I'm pretty damn close.  I don't want to live this chaotic life, but I don't know how to fix it.

I don't know if it's ego or just the "here and now" belief and desire that "this time" will be different that causes them to not consider that the last time or many previous times, "their way," won't work.

H consistently tries to carry in too much from the car at one time.  Too often, something gets dropped and broken.  Occasionally, he's able to carry in a lot, but the risk isn't worth it.   Who would carry 10 things and a baby if half the time you drop the baby??   (that is just an analogy).

My wife and I are reading Dr. Orlov's book and think we are missing a key building block; working with someone like a coach or therapist that specializes in ADHD. Upon looking into such we are having a difficult time finding a specialist in the area. We have tried using resources available through our current health care provider, Kaiser, but they have no specialists on staff apparently. We have been in contact with a few independent coaches but really have no idea who to pursue. Does anyone have any recommendations or referrals?  Thx!

Anyone else experience this?

I can't tell you how many times my H has told me that various things are "broken" when they're not.  Usually, he doesn't have them plugged in, or he isn't using it right, or some little thing is not set up correctly, so the item won't turn on.