Recent forum posts (all topics)

I'm new here, so bear with me. I've been in a relationship with my ADHD bf for 11 years. We've had a lot of the common ADHD issues, like communication problems, forgetfulness, failure to follow through etc. But I think the one issue that has been the hardest for me to deal with is lying. I guess I can't really be sure when the lying began, but it started causing problems while we were in college. He would lie about things that I'm guessing a lot of guys lie to their girlfriends about, like drinking too much or hanging out with *certain* people, that I would disapprove of.

Here is an article from Additude magazine about coping techniques for wives with husbands that have ADHD.  http://www.additudemag.com/adhd-web/article/658.html. I hope the link works.  I follow their page on facebook and get really good articles for adults and kids.

What are the options for children and adults when they come to the realization that their day to day lives are being lived in a irresponsible manner?

1) Continue to ignore it. (This is as for as it gets for most who have no mirror i.e. (parent, spouse, teacher's, friends).

Selective Sound Sensitivity Syndrome.

Wifeafraid, I am so sorry you are going through all these things you listed on your first post. I am starting a new thread after realizing these comments would have hijacked your thread in a different direction.  I hope you find a road to wellness soon and that you doctor is a good one that can help sort things out that is going on with you.  

Hi everyone,

I am a 28yo woman and finally have comes to terms I may have ADHD. But I am so afraid of going to the doctor for fear I will be called an idiot like I have been called my entire life.

My husband made an appointment for me this week knowing I wanted one but was afraid to. I'm hoping if I blurt of everything here first that perhaps someone living this way can tell me if I am just crazy, or realistically may have this condition. I guess so I can calm down a bit for the appointment if that makes any sense at all? lol

Why is it OK for people with ADHD to procrastinate and get distracted the way they do? Why tolerate it? Why stay married to someone who obviously doesn't care enough to change? People without ADHD need to stop tolerating this type of behavior. It is not OK and it is not fair. NON-ADHD people need to take a stand. I believe it is a made up disorder for people who are simply lazy. I don't think it's right that society has come up with an excuse for these people when the rest of us have to suffer. They need to learn to be responsible and society needs to stop enabling them.

Hello Everyone:

I am so happy to have found this forum. I've been reading it for a few weeks now and feel amazed at the bravery and honesty of what I've been reading.

I'm writing because I just asked my H to leave today. I packed up his belongings and told him to call his parents to pick him up. He's gone now. The house is quiet - and I feel sad - but happy. 

I have learned this:

When dh is not doing what is expected, let's say it is to sign a tax form that needs his signature, I must say, "Here is the 2015 personal tax form.  Sign here please."  Look him in the eye and hand him a pen and the form.

I don't say, "The tax form is on the kitchen counter, will you sign them please so they can get in the mail?"

I don't say, "When will you sign the tax forms? They have been on the counter for 5 days."

I don't say, "Let's do the taxes together.  What day would you be available to that with me?"

I was diagnosed with ADHD (both types) about three years ago. My doctor (primary care) didn't think I needed any kind of medication because I wasn't having trouble at work and had successful coping skills as a child/teen. That's not exactly true--I've been called to task before at work for being distracted by things like the Internet or my phone. But generally I put out good work because it's something I enjoy. I wasn't diagnosed as a child because back then I don't even think doctors knew about ADHD.

I've spent 2 years constantly fighting my ADHD husbands false accusations of mental illness. Beyond just yelling "You're crazy!" as soon as I express a concern or pain I've been caused by H's actions and behaviors. Here is the pattern:

Husband behaves outside of the scope of a reasonable person and or crosses boundaries.

Wife is hurt by the action and states that she feels (insert emotion) when H does (insert action).

H bristles. He denies the action even if you or anyone else bore wittiness.