I realized today what the overwhelming feeling I had living with my ADD ex was...pessimism.
I felt like all the dreams and goals I had before we met, were no longer attainable, nor obtainable.
I felt like the lifestyle I lived when I was single, was now entirely compromised.
Things like nice vacations, saving for retirement, home improvement projects, etc., all GONE with him.
Not for here pity or self-indulgent sentiment, just trying to understand and learn because currently I'm at a loss because all of this is foreign to me.
I have so much to say here, but not sure where to start! All I know is that this is my husband: https://www.lifehack.org/articles/lifestyle/20-things-remember-you-love-person-with-add.html. He has 90% of these traits!!
As I've mentioned above, I'm the problem. I have ADHD and it's causing issues in my relationship. Reading some of the posts here, I see that this is maybe the incorrect forum as most forum writers appear to be the competent spouses with issue. I am the issue. I have only been married for 1 month and I already feel like my wife is losing her mind taking care of me.
I'm very new to this whole new world of information and I'm finally able to understand my reactions and responses for all these years! I can't tell you how much reading this book has been the best and at times the worst news I've ever read. I'm not alone and I firmly believe that change is possible. Now that I've been diagnosed I can pin point all the problem areas to a "T" throughout our entire marriage...Too little too late my spouse says, as he filed for divorce in November and moved out of our house shortly after.
Just a quick post to say that my wife and I had a good day together. In all my thinking, writing and processing lately....I made a reference to the movie "The Odd Couple" with Walter Mathou and Jack Lemmon saying I needed to watch it again (after 30 + years? ). I suggested it too my wife after telling her that I made this mention because I thought it was such a perfect comparison to the two of us in more ways than one. Anyway.....yesterday was movie day and we sat and watched it again with a new set of eyes.
My husband was diagnosed four years ago with ADD/bipolar and depression. We live 3 hours from the nearest ADHD specialist. We're still trying to figure out the medications that are right for him. Still not finding a therapist nearby who is the right fit or really knows their stuff, which is probably the reason that the medication has still not been figured out in four years.
My boyfriend has ADHD and like everyone else, I had no idea until the sweet, attentive man I moved in with turned into the completely opposite. It's 4 years later and now he spends every single weekend going out with new "friends" he's made in the neighborhood. I am never invited. I've been told that I "get in the way" of him "making friends" If I walk up to the bar and he's there, he will literally leave. He stays out until 2, 3 even 4 in the morning. Every other weekend, he drinks until he vomits. I also suspect he may be snorting coke.
Hi.
I've been living with my ADD boyfriend for 4 months. I had no idea he had ADD until he moved in - like everyone on here, it seems.
We were working towards marriage, in fact, he bought an engagement ring. But, we've been fighting so much lately, he hasn't proposed. No problem there, honestly, as I didn't want to make a commitment, after what I'd seen.
Like everyone else on here, he has an abundance of wonderful qualities. But, his bad ones, all ADD-related, have gotten to be too much to bear.
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The ADHD Effect on Marriage was listed in Huff Post as a top book that therapists suggest all couples should read.
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