Recent forum posts (all topics)

I am just curious if anyone can offer suggestions on how to handle weekends in your adhd marriage. I have never been fond of weekends because it is so much unstructured time. My ADHD husband works 60 to 80 hours a week and likes to decompress on the weekends. We have two young children and I like to plan family time/activities into our weekend. My husband is fine with that and enjoys our family time. We both like to have some individual down time as well.  Our issues/fights occur when I ask him to give me a sense of when he will cut the grass or projects around the house.

My Husband of 16 years has been diagnosed with ADHD.  He has 4 stages according to the Amen Clinics.   We are in active counseling and working to supplement his diet to manage the ADHD.  He has not yet taken the steps towards medication which is a huge problem for me. 

Asking a question here............. I've read in the ADHD books (including Melissa's) about the ADHD forgetfulness. This forgetfulness is extreme and rampant. I see this in action when it comes to my ADHD husband's remembering important things that concern me or the family, etc., but mainly I see it in how he "forgets" what he/himself says and/or does. He says very hurtful things, behaves in hurtful ways BUT when I ask him about it he says "I don't remember that". But he will remember EVERYTHING someone says or does that hurts HIM......even "perceived"  slights.

I have been married to my husband for 12 years and been together for 14 yrs. we have a ADHD son age 10. I am Non-ADD 37 and husband is 40. We are at the stage in our lives where we both believe it's just easier to divorce. I love my husband. I want to help him with his worrying. 

I feel very odd about this, and it's very difficult to frame into words, but I feel so frustrated (?) and frightened (?) and empty (!) because my husband seems to be trying very hard to behave like a reasonable individual and - outwardly - appears to be pretty much asymptomatic at this time. This has been only for the past 2 weeks or so. For me, this experience feels like hoveringin the twilight zone, because I know that nothing has really changed and so I guess I am wary of the next big explosion.

First of all, I'm new to this forum.  Today is my first day, and this is my first post.  I happened upon this website accidentally while trying to research info about ADHD.  My husband is undiagnosed, but he has ALL of the symptoms:  I want to clarify that I love him, and I do want to spend the rest of my life with him.  I can't imagine my life without him...he's a great guy, and he is a wonderful man, but there is just something wrong...and it's ADHD.

Well up until a month ago my marriage was over. My husband had moved out, we were both blaming each other after many years of trying, failing, trying again, making agreements that would last for a month or so and then things would go back to how they were before. The ending of the marriage (we have been together 12 years and married for 10) was so fast and so brutal I barely had time to think.

When my husband and I were dating over 30 years ago, I eventually met his best friend. I didn't have a clue what his friend was talking about when he asked me if my husband had ever been on time to meet me. Little did I know about the wonders of hyperfocus! Since then I have tried every possible coping mechanism that I could think of, but he still gets mad when I insist on driving separately so that I can be on time. I have a hard time imagining what it would be like to have such a different sense of time.

Has anyone had a ADD spouse that has just been "angry" with them for no apparent reason (maybe that he resents that I've had to be "in control" of so many things/ He feels "parented" by me) for years/months and then continues to turn your teenage children against you-gang up on you?