Recent forum posts (all topics)

Suspect ADHD is destrying my marriage

My spouses family has generations of depression, alcoholism and suicide, we have argued for years about responsibilities and poor financial decisions. Recently I was made aware of Adult ADHD. My marriage is in trouble. My wife resents the issues we have had through our marriage and is contemplating divorce. As this is happening I am trying to get my son tested for the issues he has that appear to be ADHD, he is 2o yrs old.

Talking with DH about his ADD

My DH was diagnosed with ADD in college, but to be honest, I didn't take it very seriously for many years. I started reading about it a year ago and have recently checked a bunch of books out of the library and started doing more research because I realize that I need to be educated about his ADD. Honestly, his coping mechanisms were really good and worked well for a long, long time without treatment. But finally, the stresses of work and kids and money and health crises have taken their toll and his mechanisms aren't working anymore.

"sabotaging" partner's sleep, but I'm just trying to follow his good habits!

Hi all,

Wondering how to deal with this problem.  My partner prioritizes sleep above all else.  When he doesn't get enough (most of the time, sadly), he is grumpy and hair-trigger all day long.  The problem is this: I really WANT to get to sleep at the same time as him.  I don't have any issues with falling asleep or staying asleep, which is a mercy!

 

Reasons:

How I found this website/blog...

I believe my husband is an undiagnosed ADD maybe a bit ADHD... I'm wondering if anyone can recognize this behaviour in him. I arrived at this website as I was searching for information to help me understand my husband's communication style. I feel like I want to clobber him on the side of the head and reset his brain. Most of the time I feel like I'm living with a teenager, he hyper-focuses on a new hobby as if nothing else exists and lives in a peter pan world of his own.  I can't seem to get through to him, when I try to tell him something I have to pin him down ... i.e.

Technically not DH's problem, just a vent

My ADHD husband works for a small company (like 10 employees) that does not offer direct deposit. Yep, they hand him a check on payday. You can imagine how difficult it is for him to get the check to the bank (even though there is a bank branch right across the street from his office.) You can imagine the stress it causes when he swears he had the check in is pocket, yet can't find it (luckily he had left it at work). Did I mention he is the main breadwinner? I would be happy to deposit it, but even getting it home is a problem. He got paid on Thursday.

Things spouses can do on their own

Hi.  I'd like some suggestions for activities a spouse can do on her or his own when in a relationship with an ADHD spouse, particularly if the non is contemplating a formal separation or divorce.  I'm looking for suggestions both for activities that I should know how to do so as to live independently (e.g., home repairs) and activities that I can do for fun as a quasi-single person (i.e., a person who the rest of the world thinks is married but whose spouse is emotionally or physically absent or distant and thus not available for activities).

Pages