Recent forum posts (all topics)

How do I know when t leave?

Wow, where do I start? I  can't believe I found this site.  I  finally  have reached clarity  after 35 years of an adhd marriage. Our marriage has all the symptoms in Melissa's book. The most damaging are my husband's outbursts,  his lack of emotional suppor ,my disconnecting  (for my own protection  ) and  my emotional repression. We have been in counseling off and on for years. I thought I found a wonderful counselor, but he never mentioned my husband's adhd as perhaps the root cause of our problems.

Medication update

My husband started medication mid-Oct (100% for work issues, our marriage was better than it had been in many years). He started on Concerta. It made him irritable and it took me forever to convince him of this. He stopped but wanted to try another, so he started Vyvanse. It had the same affect on him, it made him really hostile and short fused. He took it long enough that I honestly thought I had lost him to the medication because he refused to see what it was doing and it wasn't an easy road getting there, but he did agree to try and stop taking it to see if it would help.

Heavy heart

Hi everyone, I've been a lurker here for months, and I guess it's time for me to post and share my story.

I'm a 34 year old gay man in a relationship with my partner of 8 years who was diagnosed with ADHD a couple of years ago.   For a long while I didn't believe in ADHD, just thought really, everyone has ADHD symptoms, it's a matter of controlling it.  I didn't truly believe in it until about a year ago.

Success in ADHD, no critical comments here please

While most of what I have seen here is negativity, judgment and generalizations which make ADHDers look infantile, inept, insensitive, abusive and generally a fearful burden to their spouses, I feel that portrays an unrealistic and lopsided view and serves to dishearten both ADHDer and "normal" alike. I know there are others here who are engaged  in the lifelong process of navigating the challenges of ADHD and have had both small and great successes. I propose this topic as a way to celebrate your success and provide hope to both your fellow ADHDs and partners as well.

Be truthful to yourself

Cheetarah: You asked me if it is hopeless. Nothing is hopeless if you are willing to do everything in your power to understand and treat your ADD or ADHD. There are many counselors available who are trained to work with you, seek them out.  Your life lies in your hands - no one else is responsible for your happiness. If you truly want to have successful relationships you WILL find a way. The first step is acknowledging that you have this affliction (which you already have)and then be patient with yourself because you didn't get this way over night.

Overwhelming sadness

After 20 years of marriage, I'm not sure we're going to make it.  My ADD spouse (I wish he had the "H", then maybe something would get done!) has been my 3rd child for too long.  I don't want to do this to my kids but I'm just not sure that I can survive.  I am so sad.  We've been in counseling, supposedly with the best.  It just costs sooo much, takes sooo long and rarely gets to the heart of the matter.  There are very few options for real support.  I've read books, read blogs, gone to groups.  He does little of it.  He's medicated, at my urging, which only seems to help him hyperfocus

What to do when it really is his fault?

I asked my husband to get something out of my car Friday (because I'd just got back from having surgery). Now I find out he's lost my car key. He swears he put it back in my purse and he didn't (because it's not there and I haven't touched my purse since). He refused to spend any time looking for it, spending the evening watching old TV shows on Hulu while I did housework. I start work next week. We discussed getting a new one from the dealership but there's no dealer for my make in our town, and I can't get to the dealer in the next county without a car.

adhd with odd

My husband was diagnosed with adhd in 2008, my daughter was recently diagnosed as having adhd as well. Last month she said she also has oppositional defiant disorder(ODD), and that this is probably being more damaging to her life than adhd itself. She prescribed SERTRALINE to treat it. But my husband´s doctor told me ODD is not usually treated with medicines. I read about this medicine and felt scared. I don´t know what to do. Please help! Is this prescription right? Is this medicine the right treatment for Odd? 

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