Recent forum posts (all topics)

i'm so tired. in tears. again. is this ever really going to be "joyful"? i went to the "joys in marriage" topic (or whatever it was called) and found little or no joy anywhere. i love him so much and i know he loves me deeply. in fact, his love includes a lot of clingy attachment. i see so much kindness and wonder in his heart. but i'm really afraid that we are just going to end up hating each other. or...i'm going to crawl out of this pit myself, and be so resentful that we'll split.

The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.  I think that the definition of 1insanity may be that of a person who is married to someone with ADD and hoping that someday, someway, some new treatment will come along and work.  Why does this have to hurt so much!!!  I told myself I was not going to get too hopeful about my husband really wanting to love me and be with me.  He promised, but he has promised for so many years, that this time he was really going to try.  He was going to come to this site and continually gain more insite a

Hi,

My wife and I seem to be stuck re: our different communication styles, having the same argument over and over.  I am a non-ADHD introvert, and she is an extrovert with ADHD.  What happens is this:  we start out having a rather nice conversation – at least from my perspective.  I say something, then she responds, then I respond, and so on.  And then, at some point, I realize I am no longer talking and she is talking “non-stop.”  I end up feeling like she is talking AT me rather than TO me or WITH me, and I start thinking “I wish she would just stop talking.”  And I find mys

Like most people on this site, I have been to hell and back with my ADHD spouse.  After much discussion, I believe that he is finally beginning to understand how his ADHD is affecting me.  I am hopeful that I have finally reached him (fingers crossed).  I basically let him know that unless something changed immediately that i was ready to leave the marriage.  He is now trying to learn techniques to make him more empathetic.  He is writing things down so that he doesn't forget.  He's trying to hold himself accountable for delivering on his promises.  He has stopped demanding "over-the-top" s

I'm a man, 42 yrs with ADHD, getting divorced ... my thread is here:  http://www.adhdmarriage.com/content/find-volunteer-slapper-your-husband-and-reason

A theory on perhaps why some people are in denial or refuse to get help for their ADHD diagnoses.    Did they grow up having a parent that was an alcoholic?    Here is my re-post on this subject.... maybe this helps someone trying to find answers....

Many non-adhd spouses are sad, angry, frustrated.  I know I'm depressed and ADHD is ruining my marriage and my overall wellbeing.  What techniques, actions, strategies can you offer (whether your non-ADHD or ADHD) in dealing with an ADHD spouse?    Are there skills I can learn to help me manage my relationship, my husband, my own emotions/reactions towards my ADHD husband.  I think hearing both sides are important...I want to build a more positive, healthier, stable life and solid partnership without being a doormat?  It's difficult to explain but things only work when I make myself vulnera

Hello everyone... came across this quote and I immediately reflected upon my ADHD and its problems upon my marriage.

"The greatest gift you can give another is the purity of your attention." - Richard Moss

My husband was diagnosed with ADD a few months ago, just after our marriage fell apart and we separated. He thinks that a non-ADD specialist therapist and some pills are all he needs to fix his problem, and it's only a "minor" problem at that. So, you could say he's deep in denial. But this isn't exactly rare with ADD husbands, as so many of us know too well.

My husband is very selfish, often misreads my actions/words, doesn't ever have empathy or sympathy for other people.  Put it this way...someone dies...he'll laugh.  He also is highly defensive and always looking to argue.  He likes it...I think he's comfortable being angry.  He's very disrespectful to me...not sure why I still stay.  Do people with ADHD have low Emotional IQ?