Recent forum posts (all topics)

I hope this will be a thread for practical tips.  Mine right now:  dealing with yard work (raking).  I'm feeling overwhelmed in terms of time and my physical condition.  (I'm small, not very strong, and perhaps prone to exertion-induced migraine headaches.)  Should I lower my standards for myself or hire someone to help?  If the latter, a service or a neighborhood young person?  

Please feel free to post your suggestions and also your requests for practical guidance if you're lacking a spouse (either because you're not married or you're married but your spouse is AWOL).

I just saw the touring "The Book of Mormon" musical in the theater.  It was great and funny!  So much of it I identified with.  How I was TAUGHT to be who I was as a child in church to be afraid of hell and OBEY the rules....no matter who or what made the rules, I was conditioned to BELIEVE and TRUST them.  I was not a Mormon but some of the "rules" were similar in my upbringing.  

H's car is old.  Over 2 weeks ago, we learned that it would require a major repair, so H announced that he needed a new car.  Fine.  I had NO OBJECTION to that.  Days go by and H makes ZERO effort to look for another car.  When I ask, H says that he'll look "later".  Later never came.  A friend of one of our kids LOVES to look for cars, so he stays current with what's out there.  After a week went by, I asked this friend to recommend some cars.  The friend happily suggested some cars, even sending some links to look at. 

Most persons don’t realize this, but the common, or popular, view of “love” involves an element of receiving something. “I love chocolate” really means that “I enjoy getting the experience of the taste of chocolate.” Similarly, “I love you” commonly implies “I enjoy playing with your body,” or “I enjoy believing that you will give me security or protection,” or “I enjoy feeling sexual pleasure with your body” (or “I want to have sexual pleasure with your body.”) As a result, Lacan, in his teachings about love, described the typical act of love as “polymorphous perversion.” [5]

I have a partner who is diagnosed (but he knew beforehand) with ADHD. Prior to being diagnosed he was my first boyfriend many years ago, now we are back together since march. Since this is not that long yet I am assuming that I am currently still experiencing the hyperfocus, I know I will be devastated when that will end.. but I know it will come.

Hello everyone,my name is Andreea Wardally and I discovered just 1 month a go that my husband have ADHD.We are separated right now because my work and documents for USA  by 7000 miles,I'm stuck in Italy (ROME),he is Florida.WE have to deal not just with 6 hours of difference  but as well with ADHD that he keep secret from the beginning and alcohol problems.One month a go his hyper focus attention  in US start to get low. Loosing  control of everything,dealing with his moods up and down,lies to cover his movements,talking about depression.

So tell me if I am being unreasonable.  A little background:  both of my sons and my DH are ADHD.  Right now only the 17 YO son is medicated.  He is a 6'4" tall senior in high school, worked full time all summer and now works part time in addition to school.  He has a girlfriend who I ADORE and she is over by us often, which is fine with me.  She is a doll and very easy to be around/have around.  The 17 YO was also in rehab in February and has been clean and sober for several months now.  By and large, he is a good boy.  It is my opinion that DH babies him WAY too much.

After over a decade together, my marriage to my ADHD spouse is over. He actually asked for the divorce, but I didn't fight it. He has threatened divorce more times than I can count, but this time I just said, "OK" and moved out. He told me later that he didn't mean it, he just said it to try and get me to "appreciate him" and realize how hard my life would be without him. I laughed. My life with him was a nightmare.  I tried extremely hard to make it work.

So this is my first time on this website and forum. My husband was diagnosed with ADHD six years ago, after our son was diagnosed. It was good timing because our marriage was at breaking point at the time, but with this new diagnosis came a new understanding and reasons to forgive. However, whilst my husband is now medicated and we are both more aware over time we have allowed things to slip a little, and I guess whilst we came a long way at the time, we still have further to go.