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File under "rant"--no obligation to comment. What could be said anyway?

So I have noticed a pattern. Each time I have sex with my ADHD husband, he treats me horribly afterwards and the next day. I have reached out to other spouses of partners with ADHD and they experience this also. Why does this happen? As soon as I let myself be vulnerable he gives me this treatment in return (which makes me feel like a piece of trash) and expects me bounce back emotionally and of course physically. Why would anyone want to continue this cycle and have sex only to be treated this way?

Today was a good day.  We got some things done, even tho I have a very nasty cold.   

How do you let what you have no control over effect you? If you live with a partner whom you share very little commonality with, you probably already know the answer to my question. Or, do you? Blindness is what I suffered with...She is wrong, I am right.

My husband's job for the past almost four years has been as caregiver for his elderly parents.  It began as a four-days per week gig; now he's there full time.  Since starting this arrangement, my husband has almost never called when he is at his parents.  (I'd estimate that he has called fewer than 20 times in the four years.)  HIs mom's health has been deteriorating quite a bit this winter.  I encouraged my husband to get his mom to the doctor (she hadn't even been outside the house n 8 months) to find out what was wrong with her, including whether she'd be eligible for hospice care.

Ok im going to try to keep this brief.

I don't know if this is an ADHD issue or what. But you all have experience that I don't have, so I'm hoping you have some advice.

my ADHD boyfriend and I just got into a fight. He seems to think its ok for couples to curse at each other. Jokingly, angrily, whatever. But if I get angry and accidentally curse at him, which I immediately regret, he's SO offended and SO hung up on it. 

I posted my story in another thread and keep coming here looking for help and answers.  I am not seeing much in the way of hope, or happy endings.  Is anyone aware of marriages that make it back to happy?  I am so scared right now that it's not possible.

These are my stories too.  My husband must have ADHD.  For 30, yes thirty, years,  I have lived with a man who has lost job after job and can't explain why.  We are currently suffering financially because his job situation just continues to get worse due to his lack of focus and organization.  He can't carry out simple tasks because he gets distracted doing others.  He never remembers anything I tell him and it makes me feel like he just doesn't care.  In the beginning of our marraige, he was so focused on me but lost that focus and now we barely communicate.