Recent forum posts (all topics)

Read "The ADHD Effect" and HE hasn't!!!!!

Hello - I am new to the forum, and wanted to introduce myself.  I've been in a relationship for nearly two years, and recently moved in with him.  Although, I suspected he may have had ADD (or ADHD - he's not hyperactive), now that I've moved in, I KNOW.  I went to my own counselor yesterday, and she (having a husband that also has ADHD), knew right away, and recommended the book "The ADHD effect on Marriage".  We are not married, but he is a widower, and he has a 10 y/o son, whom I love as my own.  We did not enter into this relationship lightly.

ADHD Husband feelings, wants & desires always first

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Please tell me how to speak to DH and what words to use where he understands that he is not the only person with feelings?   I feel like I am loosing my mind.  I feel Emotionally abused and my abuser is making himself out to be the victim.  HOW do you respond in a way that ADHD hyper Husband can understand???????  DH demands daily sex, with holds money, shares no details of our finaince, we have had to declare bankrupsy, he gambled,  he has refused to make house payment or car payment, any day now I expect people come foreclose.

not desperate, but needing advice now

I am the ADHD spouse, depression, some PTSD, manipulation and lying issues. I've been kicked out of our house with my son (who's similar to me) and am living in an even more stressful situation right now (my own mother). I feel stressed and dealing with high anxiety about not being with her again. She is simply this, the most amazing, beautiful, and down to earth woman I've ever known. and I've broken my wife's' trust and heart, not an affair physically, but yes one that was emotional. No, I wasn't getting attached emotionally, but affairs don't have to be physical right?

Defensive, Complaining, Lazy, and Bored... and it's MY fault?!

My husband and I have been married for almost 2 years now. It started slow and then we quickly realized we were meant to be and were engaged after 3 months, and married 3 months after that. At the time he was working hard, was super gentlemanly, wanted to step in on my ambitions (I've always been a world traveler- don't expect to stop), and was everything I could have asked for.

Help! Should I leave Him??

We have been together for four years. We argue about petty stuff and he doesn't acknowledge me or my feeling. He tends to misread and misinterpret things I say and I how say it. He doesn't even second guess himself. Instead of talking to me like an adult. He lashes out, acts rude and agrumentive. Even when I'm crying in front of him. I try to tell him my feelings but a lot of time he just keeps interrupting me to tell me excuses or just say nasty things to me. I try to be patient because I know he has ADD/ADHD but I feel like I'm losing my mind.

Need Feedback

I am 42, add, wife, suffering from ptsd, with adhd, hyper sex drive, husband and we are Blended family.  We have been on crazy making, circular communication, unable to resolve conflict for 3-4 years now and I have to get off the crazy train.  I have been told that if I would just be a Godly wife, and say yes to sex every time it is requested all, our problems would be solved I just sent my DH this email and was wanting some feedback, Thanks!  excuse spelling LOL!

Dread and Fear of Not Enough

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I open the frig and I see bread and cheese, juice, some sliced meats, eggs, butter, and milk. The cupboards.. soups and oats, tuna and peanut butter, the freeze... Fish and veggies. Not alot, but enough... with options. He looks and sees: "I have no food." Now there are 3 different meats, boxed desserts, freeze bulging with pizzas, and some exotic coffee for me. I like plain coffee, but what does that matter, it looked cool on the shelf. What does it matter? Appearances bring calm and a semblance of normalcy. I stopped cooking ages ago because he only wants his Favorites.

Feeling unheard, alone and overwhelmed

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Me and my H are currently in counseling. I feel as if nothing will help. he says one thing in front of people and on the phone and the next day, BAM who is this man who just went against everything he promised. Wed this week he asked me to meet up and talk(since we are living separate). I love him still so I went he says to me he got rid of video games and his social media because they're distractions.

Do mindmaps help?

Hello everyone, 

I'm a women from Belgium, since 3 months I have a relationship and yes my partner has ADHD, he told me from the begining and after 2 months I start to notice that we react on things completelly different. So I bought myself a book ADHD relationships, witch brought me to this site. The book is a huge confrontation for me. 

An act of kindness greatly appreciated

I just came downstairs from cleaning.  It is about 7 pm.  My spouse says to me "Do you want me to go get chicken for dinner.  It's Friday.  Isn't Friday my day to cook?"

I actually giggled and say, "Yes.  Yes it is."

Huzzah!  I did not mention to him that it has been well over 6 months that he has "forgotten" .  But I share it here, as I know others will stand with me in utter amazement, wondering what the heck just happened.  

I smile.  I cheer.

I said, "Thanks.  After all the stuff I had to do today, it means a lot."

 

Liz 

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