Perception and Reality
It's been a long time since I've been on this site. On the whole, things have been going really well with my wife and I. This morning I experienced something that I'd like advice on.
It's been a long time since I've been on this site. On the whole, things have been going really well with my wife and I. This morning I experienced something that I'd like advice on.
"....an ability to rationalize their behavior so that it appears warranted, reasonable, and justified...... a stunning lack of concern for the devastating effects their actions have on others.....they are completely forthright about the matter, calmly stating that they have no sense of guilt, [and] are not sorry for the pain and destruction they have caused which is associated with a remarkable ability to rationalize their behavior." This, I am guessing, is what many of us are coping with in our partnerships/marriages.
To start off with, I love someone who deserves someone functional and want to be that person. He's fairly successful but I've never had a job for more than two months in my entire life. I've got dyspraxia (sometimes known as NLD in America), ADHD, joint hypermobility and dyscalculia.
Life is often tough. There are a lot of rocks in the road to self-discovery. It takes a lot to learn what you need to do in order to be able to move past things when life gets hard.
Sometimes people will steal your heart, and make the world feel so much brighter for a while...and a lot of times that light ends up being stolen away...when they walk away, or when you no longer feel them even though they are right beside you...in that moment of longing for the memory of that person to be there in reality..the world will seem colder, and darker...
I am new to this site, but what an eye opener it has been!
Non ADD wife married to an inattentive ADD husband, and we have kids. Though, he has a very successful career and has had the same job (though several promotions) with the same employer since he graduated college (with straight As) 13 years ago.
I have been in a 2+ year long distance relationship with a man that I am convinced has ADD/ADHD. I have finally begun to see the behaviors in a real and troubling sad way.
His coping with disorganization, and lost items as well as time crunches that result, is so scary for me. I feel I am watching him in an alternative universe.
So maybe I have made excuses and maybe I have enable him and tried to save my marriage,but what can I say now I have given it 2 years and one month and it was a total waste of my effort/time.Who knows what to expect when you now meet someone and that moment presents itself and BOOM!!!!!
39 years of marriage, meds, counseling, job loss, house loss, being told I'm enabler - and the cycle goes on. Taking my energy , my sense of purpose and my hope. Please advise.
I have ADD and I have a problem managing my anger. I seem to rage at the drop of a hat. I don't want to be this way. I try exercise, meditation....Nothing seems to work. I can be going along fine and I just can get so angry at any given moment. I literally can feel it in my stomach....How can I help to calm down. It is killing my marriage.
I honestly don't what to write so I'll just tell my story briefly and hope someone here can offer me some suggestions and helpful ways to cope. Well I have been married for two years to a man I believe has ADD/ADHD. I am not qualified to diagnose him but I have done significant research on the subject and I couldn't find one symptom he does not possess and it is driving me nuts. We are a young couple I am 27 and he is 25 with a 4 year old child. I thought that a lot of his issues were due to immaturity but believe that there is some underlying issues.