Recent forum posts (all topics)

How to rebuild TRUST when he won't stop LYING?

I am new to the forum. Like so many others on here, I am perilously close to divorce. I REALLY don't want that to happen, but I just don't know what to do. My (fairly story-independent) questions are at the end, so you can skip the background story or read it- whatever you prefer :)

He is in denial and I am frustrated

We are going on 3 years next week.  He is a good guy that refuses to admit he has this illness.  He drives me nuts!  I actually talked him into going to a couples therapy session and he told the therapist "there is nothing wrong with me".  I walked out crying so hard I could barely walk.  As much as I love him I want to strangle him 90% of the time.  He is super hyperactive from dawn until bedtime.  He is a trucker so he is only home on weekends and when he is home I am lucky to get to sleep by 2 or 3 in the morning as he won't stop talking.  He will stay on his computer for hours (I have t

He's leaving

Just an update for those of you that know whats going on in my little world.  My DH is leaving after Christmas, he needs to finish out the semester and I need to have a vehicle until I can figure out how to get to work (30 minutes away) without one.  He has decided that he has never loved me and wants his ex (from 10 years ago) back because she has kids and is pregnant with another that he is going to adopt.  I cannot have more children due to a medical issue and for him (after 6 years!!!) this is a deal breaker.

"I'm not talking about this now!"

Hi all, I'm new to this site, but I've been reading it with ever-opening eyes for the past few days. I just realized that I am a woman with ADD and my husband and I are on our way to a classic control/parent/child situation. I am so relieved to have found this sight. All these years I thought I was lazy and undisciplined and now I find answers, people describing themselves, conversations, and situations that could be me. 

Telling me to stop thinking out loud

Kind of a vent I guess. I think out loud. I say out loud what I think. the medication helps stop it a little but I can't stop. I need to think out loud. I need to hear what I am thinking to make it make sense. I don't realise I am doing it its just how I think. Its harder to think in my head. My boyfriend hates it he hears me talking in another room and comes in wanting to know if I am talking to him. He also says only crazy people talk to themselves. I think that's supposed to be a joke but it hurts. I am trying to think out loud more quietly but now he says that just bugs him more! URGH!

Drip, drip, drip

I'm having huge struggles staying in the right frame of mind today.  This story is not about abuse, abandonment, joblessness, over-spending, etc., but it's like torture in that there have been thousands of these little stories in my long marriage and they just keep piling up (on?).  I just can't sweep them away fast enough to keep a loving frame of mind.

Verbal Cues

Hi all,

My wife and I have not been able to come up with a verbal cue that works for me to let my wife know when I find myself not listening to her anymore in a conversation because she is going into more detail than I can take in.  She hasn't been able to suggest anything, and whatever I suggest she doesn't seem to like.  I'd love to hear from people with and people without ADHD to hear what you have found that works.

Also - I'd like to ask - do you use these cues/words only when it's the two of you, or also when you are with others?

Help wife leaving Monday!

I've never posted here before and I've really not even read any posts. My wife has read a number of posts to me due to their similarity to our life. Most of the time I would glaze over and partially listen but sometimes I would catch details that would remind me of me, of course then I would completely shut down all listening. Well now I'm in dire straits, searching for a way to show her how I really feel, how much she really means to me. Her life with me  has been a roller coaster with each dip dropping lower then the last.

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