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A little background info first my husband and I have been married for 5 and a half years. Our relationship has had it's ups and downs. We also have a 19 month old son. Since our son was born we have had problems and they kept getting worse. He was never around and his anger towards me was even worse than ever. I took my son and moved out in April so that my son would be out of the house where all the arguments were going on. It was supposed to be a short-term thing, like only 6 weeks max. After I left, my husband cheated on me with our neighbor.

I've lived with my girlfriend for a year, and we've been together for almost three years - so I hope you don't mind that I'm in ADHD and Marriage forum, even while we're not married.  Too much of the book resonated with me - and to be honest, we're more committed than a lot of married couples.  And if you ask me, ADHD (and all the fallout) is the thing that's keeping me from taking that next step.  I'd marry the woman I fell in love with in those first 6-12 months in a heartbeat.

He got diagnosed 3 months ago and I just want him fixed. I'm so tired of lame excuses and want this to end. If I knew he had a brain disease I would never have married him. I am so angry! His medication is not doing its job! He does better at work and with chores around the house but he isn't better otherwise. I found this site looking around for a different medication or something to try. I can't believe what I've been reading about ADHD, I can't believe I married someone with a brain disease that makes him uncaring, lazy, irresponsible, selfish, messy pig!

Married for 4 years (lived together 1.5 years) - Yes our dating and living together was all hyperfocused, now that I've learned about it from this website - but at the time I thought it was love.  I (non-ADHD) was diagnosed with cancer, while we were living together - I went through chemo, radiation, surgery, chemo - my husband started drinking (heavily) - at first, I felt guilty because, after all I had cancer, it was stressful to me, I can understand that it must have been pressure for him.  I'd mention his drinking, and he would promise to slow down or quit.  Didn't happen, promises br

Anyone got tips on how to keep the attention with an ADDer in a long distance relationship?

Natalie

First, my husband is over the IT dept for our city. Small city, but still a decent sized network. Long story short, few months back issues started happening with his servers and it has lead to the discovery of a fairly ugly hacking job and a REALLY ugly worm that he's worked 16+ hour days for WEEKS now trying to battle. Thanks to his ADHD/hyperfocus he would not consider seeking outside help and a couple of time stayed up for 48+ hours working on it.

I jokingly like refer to myself as a wife who was in a previous life a man who did not appreciate his wife. I feel that this relationship is the purgatory I have to go thru to redeem myself. My question is that after 22 years, I am exhausted, depressed, angry.... and some, and really really doubtful this could ever work. Especially considering his constant unkept promises. Yes there has been progress very recently, but I feel at the end of my rope and that its just too little, too late.

I've been dating my boyfriend for around three and a half months now. Things got pretty serious pretty quick, as I've come to understand ADHD relationships do (what with the hyperfocus and such). We're long distance, he lives in IL and I live all the way in Ontario, so sometimes we miss each other lots.

I am a 26 year old active duty,wife, and mother with ADHD. We have been married two years, and I have been actively seeking therapy and making tremendous progress. Unfortunately, my husband has no real "desire" to learn about this disorders symptoms. He says that he understands, but that is a crock of sh!t. He intentionaly plays with my compulsive nature and uses it against me later. I am frequently verbally abused and he even cheated on me. I have been trying so hard to "understand" his needs as a man, but I do not get the same thing in return.

"Are you doing this on purpose?" I asked him, tears streaming down my face, "because I am trying really, really hard to work this out, right now. "Yup," he said smugly, smirking at me.

And that was it. I lost it and smacked him across the face. "Get out. Get out now."