Recent forum posts (all topics)

Here we go again.

Earlier this year I caught my suspected-ADHD spouse with crystal meth.  At the time he was exhibiting the behaviors of a daily meth user.  It was HELL to live with him during this time.  Like any addict he denied he was on drugs.  I threw him out of the house. 

He showed promise he'd turned things around, started acting responsible (cleaning up his messes, taking care of his rented house, cooking) so he moved back in after a few months.

I'm sharing a true story. Something my ADHD husband did for me. This was only a few years ago well into our marriage. This is only one of many loving romantic or quirky things he has done in the course of our relationship. One of the reasons I feel he deserves for me to try to work at our marriage and one of the many reasons I love him. It took a lot of organizing, planning and follow up to make it happen, so I know there is hope. I also believe only an ADHDer could truly pull this off the way he did.

Since I found this site, I find myself posting a lot. It has been cathartic. Over the years I've had some support from my kids and a best friend who has a now adult child with ADHD.  She left her ADHD husband and is thriving, but I want to try to stay in mine. Most of the time I felt so alone and no-one understood either of us. I can understand why some of the posters sound so negative. I know for me I've held it all in for so long, it just pours out in this arena. A refuge. I wonder if once the pain and hurt and "bashing' gets out the tone becomes more positive?

As I read more on this site, it is as if a lightbulb has gone off. I'm finding more hope. During Thanksgiving dinner my ADHD husband had us all hysterically laughing. His sense of humor  and timing is amazing and hilarious. I've learned over the years it is one of his coping mechanisms.

I see that it's been 15 weeks and five days since I first posted here. That must have been right after I heard Melissa talking about her book and thinking - that sounds a lot like us. Since then I've read the ADHD and marriage book, a lot of delivered from distraction and a lot of posts here. I've talked to my husband about some of what I've read and we've talked about how some things about ADHD sound kind of like him. Our marriage isn't bad but there are things I thought could be better and they sound a lot like ADHD & marriage.

New here, found this site after yet another crisis that sent me looking for some hope and answers. After reading many of the posts, I just sat numb, it was like reading about my marriage over and over. what struck me the most was the question, "Why do you stay?" I could give so many answers to that because I hear that question all the time. He read  books on ADD and tried things for a while, but nothing stuck.

I am new to the whole research thing and have had a long haul to get here.  My husband has ADHD and is very aware of his diagnoses.  He has sought out medication but no real support.  We have been in marriage counseling several times but never addressed our specific issues instead focusing on issues with his mother, of whom we are both sure is undiagnosed, We both work full time and until recently were both home at night with the kids.  My son is 8 and we have run the gauntlet with him.  He has been asked to leave several daycares, has been in a couple of private schools one of which allo

One constant source of stress for me, that I am at a loss as to how to resolve is my husband's constant complaints about his job. I'm torn between feeling like he's surely to quit any given day and just thinking he's just 'venting' and it's not as big of a deal to him as he makes it seem to me. He constantly says things like "I am at my wits end" "I hate this place!" "I can't do this anymore" "I am about to lose my mind" and has even asked me "If I find another job, do you care if I quit this one?"

First of all, reading through this forum and realizing that my experience has been so similar to many of the members here has been somewhat therapeutic. I've noticed that there are three very common feelings: loneliness, anger and resentment and that I'm not alone or crazy for feeling these three things so strongly.

In many ways, my story is so typical.

My ADD partner noticed me the last couple of days!

Normally he's pretty inattentive but because I've been home sick from work he's been showing his caring side. He made me soup and tea and brought it up to me in bed last night. In the morning he felt my forehead on waking to see if I was feverish... He asked me if I was hungry and then proceeded to make me breakfast in bed.

When he went out to the store he asked me if I wanted anything.. And he told me he'd mail a couple of letters for me that must go out today.