Recent forum posts (all topics)

Struggling with lack of results

All progress for us has stopped. I am trying so hard to accept that, as the spouse of an ADDer, I do not matter. All is about him, his meds, his needs, how I speak to him so as not to damage his self-esteem, etc. No one takes care of me. No one cares if I have to climb in and out of my car from the passenger's side because we can't afford to fix my car, and never will.

Dealing with despondency

My husband was diagnosed about six months ago, and has been taking meds, which seems to help.  We have been on a bit of a rollercoaster ride since then - coming to grips with this has not been easy on both of us (not least because for about a year before the diagnosis, I was at my wits' end, and wondering how much more of the marriage I could take). 

I promise

that most of this is miscommunication. I have this boyfriend that I put on a pedestal, or so I do in my eyes. I'm scared he's forgotten me up there. I've been uncontrollable, and in fits of terror and paranoia, I've said things I don't mean. And I've gotten him to the point where he is angry and I don't think he likes me anymore. And I want to say that I promise, how you see me, maybe alot of it is this ADD, but I promise some of it is miscommunication.

ADD/ADHD Career Seminar in NYC (Manhattan)

Forum: 

 

Manhattan Adult ADD Support Group Hosts Career Seminar With Author/Entrepreneur Michael Laskoff

MAADD Support Group hosts Michael Laskoff, author of Landing on the Right Side of Your Ass: A Survival Guide for the Recently Unemployed, from 6:15 to 9 p.m. June 10 at Seafarers & International House, 123 East 15th Street, NYC

 

While Attention Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder has been known to cause complications finding and maintaining work, there are some tips to combat the difficulties.

 

Facts

I would like to vote for more careful commenting, for example, not haphazardly stating a forum member's possible medical detail, which may in fact be false. I move fast, and I know I've made mistakes in my wording, but I do try to identify when I'm quoting someone (by using quotation marks) and when I'm writing my opinion or perception.

Can they change?

My husband and I have been separated for almost 2 months.  He pretty much abandoned me and all responsibility.  I had no choice but to check out and go into survival mode to take care of me.  I was left with no choice other then to detach myself from him so that's what I did.  Now he's begging to be with me, being the nice, gentle, affectionate, attentive.  The man I saw I got glimpses of when we first met. 

What really motivates ADHDers?

 

One of the posts on this forum opened up so much for me. I now understand why my wife (the ADHDer) does the things she does. I thought she wasn't interested in me, but I now know that's not the case. She matches ALL these symptoms described by many on this forum. Thank you so much.

I have a couple of questions to try and understand her better, hopefully someone has had a good experience with their ADHD spouse:

How do I deal with my life being about him and not me?

I've been struggling the last few days. We actually had a good day Memorial Day, involving more walking than is comfortable for me, but I give in because my husband and dog love it. We don't fight when we're out of the house because there is nothing that is undone.

How to make my parents "understand" my huband's ADHD?

I have been married for 6 and a half yrs. Last year my husband was told he had ADHD, for him it was what he needed personally, because many things finally made sense to him about himself and the whys of things.  For me...I must admit I was skeptical, even wrong.  What I mean is that upon learning of his situation I desprately held on to the misconeption that once he got medication that things would miraculously fall into place, that things would get done, I would get consideration from him and that the fights would become less.

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