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Has anyone been able to rekindle a relationship after your ex-ADHD partner gets treatment?

Hi, all,

Someone posted this in another thread, and it rings so true for me that I decided to make it a new topic.  

My ex would acknowledge the ADHD when doing so suited him.  Specifically, he seemed to like the "I am a victim" aspects of having a diagnosis but not the "Now you need to do something about it" aspects.  

There is a TV show called "Princess" on the Lifetime channel.  It is SO interesting for me to see these "usually young" women who have been living carefree off the generosity and love of family and friends. They ALWAYS have an impish grin and seem to believe they are particularly cute and smart.  I see my old husband in them and want to kick myself for letting him drift along while I strived and worked so hard.  With him believing that he is smart to not have had to work too hard for his own home and family. He likes to say he does the work but doesn't actually do it.

I am not sure how to introduce myself on this board, so rather than a 'hi' post, I thought I would contribute here with brief on the progress my partner and I have been making in building our relationship. I am a thirty seven year old professional in Australia who is currently two and a half years into a long distance relationship with a lovely, forty year old American. We met on a fan board for a band that we both like and were firm friends from the first ridiculous joke.

Have you ever wished that you could be free from pain? The pain that you attribute to your marriage relationship? I sure have....I have found in my own life, that this freedom I have sought has taken me through many stages of psychological realities....I have been stuck in some of these stages for years...Because I would determine it to be a safe place (really I was just trapped there, due to expectations I was placing)....But when the reality would eventually set in, that it wasn't going to ever bring me to the place of real freedom....I knew I had more work to do:(.....

Hello like to get some advice , my wife is adhd she a special ed teacher who cant hold down a job , mostly from what i see no flexibility (black or white) and usually has a hard time with staff members, what i find is she is constantly negative

its a real struggle for me financially , Im on dialysis and i go to work everyday, what iam trying to do is not react to her problems , nobody want to be around her because its constant neg about someone or something ,

There are some things that, being in a marriage, are important.  But when you’re the Non in a dysfunctional adhd marriage, they suddenly become more important. 

By nature, I’m a pretty accommodating person.  That’s a good trait... as long as you are accommodating because you have a good balance. (“These are my boundaries.  If what is requested doesn’t cross my boundaries, then I don’t mind doing things they way they wish.”)

My bf of 10 years has ADHD, diagnosed as a child. However, as an adult refuses to seek medical advice and treat his ADHD. We lived the honeymoon phase, believe it or not for 6 years. And when we were forced to endure a series of catastrophic events, one which was my father's sudden passing, the honeymoon ended quite suddenly without us even realizing what had happened. We are now stuck in a parent/child like relationship, so much so he sleeps on the couch.