Recent forum posts (all topics)

This is my first time posting.  This site seems like a lifeline right now.  I don’t have anyone else in my life that understands what it’s like to be married to someone affected by this disorder.  

Almost every book and article I've read mentions how most nonADHD spouses get into the habit of nagging and criticizing, etc.  In our house, that didn't happen.  When I would ask for him to take something on or to help, he would get so angry, even though I was only asking.  Very often, that very first request would elicit the "stop nagging me" accusation, even though it was the first request.  And I wanted to avoid his anger so much that I didn't ask anymore.  Plus, he didn't get angry and then change later.  He just got angry.

Does anyone have any experience with the Amen Clinic?

Hello to all.  I've been reading the site for several weeks.  What incredible validation (!!!) as I have read so many stories.  I'm so glad this site is here!

Hello,

How have others overcome the ADHD spouse feeling like the non-ADHD spouse is putting them on probation?  My ADHD wife keeps saying it feels like that, which makes me feel horrible, but I'm also exhausted with the clutter, forgetfullness, lack of responsibility and mistakes (many that cost us financially).  We've been married 17 years and have two sons ages 14 and 16. It kills me to think of breaking up the family over forgetfullness or household clutter. I feel my kids will blame me.

You all know from my previous posts what a mess my ex's life is and that it's been that way for a very long time. 

Well I just found out that he bought the new girlfriend a diamond solitaire ring that she is now sporting on her left ring finger.  

Yet he is telling his family oh, we're not engaged.. it's just a gift...

Just two months ago he told his son and daughter in law that he didn't want to introduce this woman to them because he wasn't sure it would last and that he didn't want to be tied down to anything. 

Guys, I need a pep talk.  My unmedicated ADHD husband was fired from his third job in 6 years on December 29.  We have yet to receive any unemployment despite the state saying it's coming and receiving many letters to that affect.  To his credit he has taken many side jobs and we are not in too bad a shape financially, but we will be if the unemployment does not come through.  He has had two interviews with a good company and it sounds like they may make an offer early next week.

My husband has been diagnosed with ADHD, is 60 & agrees he may have it, but will not medicate.  Our marriage of 28yrs has always been a struggle due to his ADHD.  Last year he betrayed me by cheating on me online.  I was devastated  and did not understand his behavior at all.  It was way out of character for him.  We have been going thru counseling and he said he felt I did not love him any longer.  I know at the time I was requesting more of him in the relationship and he felt rejected.  I recently have been reading about RSD and ADHD.

In just the last few days I have come to realize that my spouse suffers from ADHD.  Having been with him for a very long time, so many things make sense now.  This situation has caused so much trouble and anger on my part.  He is frustrated and doesn't understand me either.