Recent forum posts (all topics)

One of the best feelings in the world is knowing your presence and absence both mean something to someone.

So, given that, it seems H has from the beginning not noticed or cared about my presence or absence, even that my absence is preferable to H, doesn't that mean that I should go? I feel like I have been ignored for over 40 years.  That has done a number on my ego and confidence.

Given that I have come lately to defensively ignore H and have a difficult time having him near, doesn't that mean that I should go?

Hello.

He's fighting me tooth and nail. From begging to attacking to generally being obtuse. I've tried explaining several different ways about why he needs to move out. I can no longer take the financial hits, the passive-aggressive attacks, the piles of dirty laundry, cleaning up after his plethora of pets, the trash left everywhere but in the trash can... after six years, I just can't anymore...

I've been with my husband 17 years.  I feel like it's always been some issue or another.  I feel like I am the only responsible one.  I feel like he can't be trusted with anything significant.  I feel alone.  I feel he has little empathy for what he does to me.  I feel like he has put me through hell and I hate who I am now.  I am an angry, resentful, paranoid person because of his behavior.  This weekend, I found out yet again, he was allowing porn to creep into his life.  He has a sponsor and goes to SAA.  I knew he was starting to look at things again and gave him the opportunity to tell

The stress of our first baby landed us in a couple's psychiatrist, where I was diagnosed with ADHD. After being undiagnosed and untreated for 10 years, I can understand my wife's frustration. But her attitude reads as "I didn't sign up for this" and she does not want to participate or collaborate with my treatment. She doesn't want to go to therapy anymore and she is unwilling to read a single book on couples and ADHD (arguing she is doing her PhD and doesn't have time for that).

I know that is a weird kind of off the wall way to title a post in the section called "Progress and Hope"...since, in my personal opinion based on my own experience with a bonifide Narcissist ( amongst a host of other personal problems he has ) as it appears, many are not in disagreement with that assessment including myself (and even in the opinion of the attitudes expressed on this forum as well )  This makes for a fascinating case study in human socio-psychological phenomenon that is really easy to see?  As I have experienced this myself, if you want to see the worst in people, come out

Hi there. I have lurkerd/posted before. I live in Japan, my husband is Japanese. My husband has told me that he has ADHD, and he has never taken meds for it. He's caused scenes in public, we can no longer go to certain places together. When he has a temper tantrum he throws things, yells, and calls me every name under the sun. No filter, no impulse control. We've almost gone bankrupt 3x and I have had to bail him out each time. Our sex life dried up on the day we signed our marriage documents.

I just want to thank you guys for all the help and advice you have given me over the last couple of months. I have gone from being anxious, depressed, confused, lost, sad, grieving, to healthy. It's amazing. It really is. My relationship with my husband has been getting better and better over the last couple of months. 

I was just wondering how many this happens to or what to do about it.  Say your SO asks you something and you answer it how you remember, or how you think you remember it because this is what your mind is telling you what happened. I feel I do this a lot but it gets perceived as me lying about it and I dont know what to say or do so I just go along with it and say Im lying about whatever it is. Its hurting my marriage, not the only thing but still a big part of it.