Recent forum posts (all topics)

My wife and I know each other for over 12 years, started dating 11 years ago and we been married for 9 years. While our relationship has never been perfect I do love my wife. I have to tell the story for the beginning since I think there were some unresolved issues that probably I dealt with since we started dating. I was married when my wife and I started dating, she knew about, my previous marriage was pretty much over and I was just waiting for my wife to move out the apartment since it was on my name so I can move out too.

After 21 years of marriage my husband finally admitted that he is never going to have an intimate and caring relationship with me. He's never even going to try. He finally admitted that his priorities are going to be pursuing wealth, high adrenaline hobbies and sports competitions. And of course he wants to maintain a sexual relationship. This was not a heated argument with yelling and insults. It was a very calm discussion that he had put much thought into. 

My husband's dose of adderall was increased in May, along with a few other new drugs, for anxiety, blood pressure, etc. This past week we brought home my 4 1/2 year old nephew, for good ( my parents have been raising him, my sister is a drug addict, and we are taking him in, forever :)  ).

I have never been one to post on line but I find myself here because I've given up on my husband. I seem to not be able to control this deep seeded resentment I have for him. We have been to psychiatrists,  psychologists and therapists.  He has never gotten a clear diagnosis but it is somewhere in the middle of OCD, AHDH, and some think bipolar spectrum. When I list them off like that it sounds like my husband is a mess but he not… completely. He is the nicest man. He would never harm another person or say unjust things about anyone. And he loves me unconditionally.

My ADD spouse moved out.  I've delayed the dissolution because I've been conflicted about reconciliation, I've been so angry for the past 3 years of bad counseling and getting to the point where we found out (after 23 years of chaos) that he has ADD, I just didn't know what the right thing is.  I wouldn't know what to do if I prioritized myself, I have 5 kids and I've been a caregiver for my grandparents and a special needs uncle my entire adult life.  I'm down to an 11 & 12 year old, a dog, and me.  Do ADHD people ever come back after leaving?  My Husband has convinced himself that our

Right now, it feels to me as though my lowering my expectations to correlate with my husband's alleged functional ability equals, to him, a green light to blow me off.  I'm too dispirited to give examples or details.

This is something I've heard over and over in our almost 8 years of marriage, how he says everything is ALWAYS his fault and he's ALWAYS getting blamed for things that aren't his fault. Now very clearly I have pointed out many times where he was the person responsible but he refuses to accept it. 

Do your ADHD'ers say this? He's like a massive martyr and doesn't see anyone else's suffering ever.

It has been so long, I forget what it feels like to have someone care about me. I have been married almost 8 years and have been thinking about how in those 8 years I think we have French kissed twice, how awful sex has been because he's incredibly awkward and critical, how I haven't wanted to even touch him in years because he does not shower or shave regularly (which I'm blamed for, of course). His fingernails are longer than mine. He is the laziest person I know, eats crap day in and out, makes a bunch of pasta for himself and doesn't want to share it with me or our child.

I am with my husband 8 years, married 2, and he "claims" to have adhd, but was never formally diagnosed...we already see a therapist, although most recently ive been asked not to bring certain things up so im not sure even what we are accomplishing...my husband has a hx of drug abuse and has been taking adderall for many many years...but not as prescribed... He'll fill his 30 day supply and it will be gone in 4 days...for a while i started taking his script and not allow him to fill it... But now he's of course manipulated me to feel like he's entitled to it...

This is huge... After almost 6 years, 2 of marriage, I have finally decided in my heart that I need to leave. I'm leaning towards legal separation for now.. See if he changes MAYBE we will reconnect, but who knows. Anyways I am in a predicament. He knows I have wanted to leave for a while. But then I changed my mind and we went to counseling and I've stayed, now I have made my decision to be thoroughly done, though I won't be able to physically leave him until 6 months from now, until I finish my accounting degree..