From a husband's perspective
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I am a husband who lives with ADHD and I have only recently been diagnosed. I have been reading through this forum to help find some direction and strategies to help my wife.
This is an example of how I don't understand how husband's brain works!
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He doesn't go to work half the time, can't bring home enough money to pay for his share of bills and mortgage yet just now sends me a link to a Craigslist ad for a "toy hauler" kind of deal--a 14' box truck he says that can double as a race vehicle and traveling rig. It's what he wants for his race weekends with his motorcycle so there's a place to sleep and to put all his stuff. Only $12,500!! He says that that's what he wants to get if we sell our current truck next year! Really? So we MIGHT get $4000 for our truck and where do you think the other $8500 is going to come from?
He won't admit he needs help too.
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Hi there,
My boyfriend of 9 months now is ADHD. At first, the relationship was wonderful and he was charming and respected me.
It seems that now he blows up at every little thing I have to say or if I do something he doesn't like, instead of just talking
to me, he spouts off mean horrible things and gets me crying. I know I'm not perfect and I'm an emotional person anyway
, but I feel like he plays on my insecurites somehow by making me turn into this crying little girl. Then of course after he calms
help and resources for young adults
Out of five people in my family, three have been diagnosed with ADHD. My eldest son was diagnosed in college, and he still rebels against the diagnosis, refusing treatment just like his father. I am sad as I watch him struggle in areas that might be easier with help.
Lying about money
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Has anyone experienced their ADHD partner lying about money?
Dealing with a ADHD spouse
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My husband and I been married for 12 years. The 8 years have been very rough and not very good. We fight constantly and he blames me for his problems. He's had ADHD since he was very young. He recently went to a doctor and got medication and doesn't seem to be helping. When he loses something he goes straight to me and starts blaming me for misplacing something he put down 30 seconds early. I get tired of it. He's become very angry and has placed a lot his angry to me. I've always been a very happy person and easy going. Being around him makes me feel a lot angry and upset.
Engaged but no wedding date
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I have been engaged for approximately one year to a man with ADHD. We have been in a relationship for three years. At first I did not notice his symptoms; I thought he was just very energetic and spontaneous. After knowing him for three years now, I am beginning to realize that these qualities are not going to change. He is extremely messy and rarely helps with chores. He had a gambling problem which stopped, however I am always afraid that it will return. He is been pulled over numerous times for speeding and had his license revoked. He also seems to be addicted to pornography.
Turns out it's MY fault husband couldn't go to work today! Who knew!
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So if you read an earlier post of mine from this morning you'll see that H once again didn't go into work today. He had a root canal appt at 10:45 but I see his text to his boss this morning at 4AM stated that he had a dentist appt at 7AM and didn't know how long he would be. Okay...a 7AM dentist appt? They don't even open around here until 8AM! He never did call or text after that about not going in even though he never went in to work. How does that work?! How does this man still have a job??
from the ADHD newsletter
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The newsletter talked about being disconnected. That you have to share your thoughts, feelings, etc with your partner. But of course you have to feel safe in your relationship to do so. I don't think I feel "safe" in my relationship. If I share my feelings to my ADHD spouse, I either get yelled at, ignored, or made fun of. If I ask my spouse's opinion about something, I get a sarcastic remark in return. It all makes for very difficult communication.
stick to the script
I was just listening to a radio soap where a young couple are dating and flirting while reading posts here form people feeling lonely hurt or misunderstood. I'm tempted to get hubby to help me write a script for a date and then me and hubby can go out and stick to the script and have a lovely time! any thoughts? m
