Recent forum posts (all topics)

I'm still in the trenches on some matters because I believe my husband and I should communicate about issues such as our grown daughters and our shared finances.  But I'm so much more independent than I used to be, and I want people to know there is hope for disentangling from a dysfunctional relationship with a spouse or partner who chooses to go untreated.  

Hello everyone,

Did anyone see this week's episode? She pretends to be all sweet and normal, and then - when she doesn't get her way and the boy refuses to do her dirty work and walks away from her abuse...Rusty's mother screams at him, "Can't you just show me some of the forgiveness that I am showing you?!" So familiar, the whole routine. I am in tears.

I'm beginning to wonder if I'm just a set-in stain

Another day wasted here just circling the drain

I know that I'm not crazy

I'm not claiming to be sane

I'm like a thousand shards of glass

That make up this windowpane

What if I told you there was a chemical solution

A fork in this dead-end road of disillusion 

Just to calm the storm

A little tweak

A path to resolution 

I can ADD but not subtract

I divide with lack of tact

Multiply distraction like static on the radio

I normally only comment when things are bad- to vent or commiserate with someone else suffering... However,  there was a surprisingly hopeful development yesterday, which I want to post about!

I have been at the end of my proverbial rope for months now- but certainly in the last few weeks...

We are about to have some of my husband's family as guests for a few days. I am especially uncomfortable about this because of the state of messy chaos in our home. My husband is going into one of his power clean up spurts that only ever occur when he is on the verge of being embarrassed by someone who would be a guest in our home. They will still have to sleep in our exercise room, because the bedrooms are full of his piles of stuff, and I will still be terribly embarrassed to have them here ( never mind the fact that our marriage is hanging on by the slimmest thread).

I am really writing this to get it out. I cannot post this on public forums where people know me personally.

14 years ago, I was 24 and so excited to get married. I knew my husband to be had some anger issues, but I thought we could work them out and they would get better with time. I knew he was funny and a guy everybody liked. We had our share of fights in the 3 years we had been together, but he was so much fun to be around and really seemed to get me. I could not wait to start the next chapter of our lives together.

My husband had shoulder surgery 10 days ago and decided to stop taking his adhd meds while on his pain meds. Ever since he stopped taking his meds we have fought non stop.  I am very frustrated. Today he went to the doctor and was told that he will be off for another 4 weeks. He could go back to light duty but he refuses to do that. His hates his job and wants to quit. I am 7 months pregnant and feel so frustrated that he is taking off all this time now and only getting 60% of his pay and is not thinking about what is best for our family.

I need help and suggestions for living with an ADHAD spouse.