Recent forum posts (all topics)

What do you want in a spouse?  

Dh seems to want sex for his release, my adoration, my respect, laughter, eroticism, cute flirting, freedom to do what he wants the way he wants to do it, no criticism, no discussion other than joking, no talking about finances, someone to take care of finances and to make a home for him, freedom to come and go,  a drinking partner. He just wants us to enjoy ourselves.....in essence, to me, that is singlehood (or boyhood).  This is what I gave him for decades. My mistake.

My partner is 32 and has struggled immensely with adhd his whole life but has only recently been diagnosed. Due to late diagnosis he has picked up every bad behaviour/way of coping imaginable. He cannot control his anger nor unpredictable mood swings, he has a low self esteem.

I dont know how much longer I can go without affection, attention or a feeling that Im loved by my ADHD boyfriend. We've been together for over 3 years and have a 17 month old daughter and I have an 11 year old son from a previous relationship that is very close to my boyfriend. So I have every reason to want to make this work. But how long can a person go feeling completely ignored?? I'm asking anyone with experience in a situation such as this how they find a way not to take it to heart. Because I do. I've tried everything to get his attention but nothing seems to work.

It's been a few months since I last posted on this site.  Since then I have tried to make it seem like a good decision to give up a well-paying job in order to allow my ADHD wife could have some space between her and her mother; I think because she doesn't feel like a woman around her.

I was diagnosed a little over 2 years ago. 

If anyone has any books to recommend or advise please feel free to let me know. I want to find out as much as I can about this.

Thank You

I just finished the book "The ADHD Effect on Marriage" on 9/22/13. Great Book! I just started reading "Is it You, Me, or Adult A.D.D." .

I am going to slowly start posting here. Its a process for me putting myself out on a public forum. The biggest thing I have discovered in my case is that medicine isn't enough. Treatment, Exercise, and Reclaiming myself is important too.

Hi everyone, I'm new here...    hi!!   So I have been in a relationship with my first live-in ADHD boyfriend.   It's been interesting.   Like everyone - first contact was very electric.  Then, it kind of went crazy and I think we had sex for the first 6 months (on and off) and then decided to move in together.    We have officially not had sex for about a year now.   So you're probably wondering why I'm with him?  Well, other than the ADHD moments, he's wonderful.   He's a musician, we have a lot of interests in common, and he's a caring person.

I am new to this forum and looking for advice.   I am at my wits end and think my husband has ADHD. I am trying to find a way to delicately bring up the subject with him. I have a strong feeling it will end up that he completely shuts down or a huge argument. How did your ADHD partner get diagnosed with ADHD as an adult? Did the non-ADHD partner urge him or her to get diagnosed?

I have been with my husband for 17 years and am finally convinced that he suffers from ADHD. Over the years, we have logged many hours in marriage counseling sessions. We have always fought a lot over many things including finances and spending money on unnecessary items. He is a very successful entrepreneur, but he has had several job changes to get to this point. He has explained that he is motivated by money so in order to get motivated he needs to buy things for countless hobbies that come and go....

I just realized I never posted on this topic. A while back when my FH was diagnosed as ADHD (after him saying that he thinks he may have it, but wasnt sure. And after forcing him to visit with a psychiatrist [he had fears of being labeled a looney....]), and doing intensive research into finding the best psychiatrist possible, and being diagnosed, his family refused to accept that. He told his family because I figured it would help to have supportive people around him. His family would be more understanding, and after all it is his family. Why not tell them. BAD MOVE.

I've been doing a lot of reading on here, and sometimes I see similarities with my marriage, but in a lot of ways, my ADD husband seems "not so bad" compared to some.  So then I wonder if I'm making big deals out of nothing, or if I'm the one that is the problem.

We've been married 17 years, and have come close to divorce twice.  The first time was after a pregnancy loss, husband was undiagnosed, I needed support and he played video games all day.  We got him medicated and both of us into therapy.