Recent forum posts (all topics)

Moving On

Forum: 

No need for any dramatic story -- there isn't one.  Just accumulated small, undramatic things to the tipping point.  So tired.

But I do want to express gratitude to many of you who have helped me with my questions, listened to my supposed "wisdom" with an open mind, and pointed out things I've ignored about my own attitudes and actions.  This forum has been a necessary part of my journey.  Best wishes.

The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel

Forum: 

We saw this movie last night. Don't see it with your ADD DH.  My DH is acting terribly suave and self righteous right now after seeing it.  He is giddy as a lark and on top of the world and I will have to put up with him for a while.  There is a couple who consist of an unhappy, nervous wife married to an impulsive, care free, possibly ADD husband.

I have OCD and he has ADHD

I have OCD tendencies (mostly about keeping the house clean and tidy) and my boyfriend has pretty severe ADHD.  We live together, and we fight constantly about how he forgets to clean up after himself, put things away in the proper place, clean his dishes, and other things that involve cleanliness or tidiness.  He's prescribed Adderoll for his ADHD, but he sometimes forgets to take it; either on or off his meds, he still is super forgetful and untidy.  It drives me crazy, but he doesn't see it as a big deal.  At first, I tried to show him how I liked things to be, and asked him to do it tha

"It just so happens that your marriage here is only MOSTLY dead..."

"...There's a big difference between mostly dead and all dead. Mostly dead is slightly alive."

A month and a half ago, before I was diagnosed, DW was ready to move out and get divorced.  Finances prevent us from doing that for the next year, and she moved into the spare bedroom instead.

In the meantime...

Feeling confused and deflated, advice needed

Finding myself so confused and deflated, and completely unsure what to do. I've posted on here a couple of times only but have taken a lot of heart from the many posts I've read over the last year or so. I've been married for 20 years to a man who was diagnosed adhd a year ago at the age of 48. Together we've faced a lot of big challenges, particularly in the last 8 to 10 years. DH is an alcoholic who has been sober nearly 4 years after some really close calls.

Help!!

I have been married 12 years to what I have always thought to be the most amazing man ever. Sometime in the last few years...things have changed. He has always been anti social and forgetful (in an unusually extreme way). I always blamed this to his pot use. However, being off pot for more than a year now, hasnt helped. Lately Ive been researching things and keep stumbling across ADHD and they all describe him to a T. His comeback to anything is that I like to take away anything he enjoys. Or that I force him to do things he doesn't like.

Feeling despondent concerning communication patterns

Today, I took a calculated risk and told my husband that I felt the need to talk about a subject that is very painful for him, his failure to look for a job since he was fired three years ago.    He has said in the past that this topic always makes him feel inadequate and guilty and so on and so forth, and so I have grudgingly avoided talking about for several months.  But I was thinking today once again that it just isn't fair to take a major issue off the table because of one person's discomfort.

Tired and Feeling Hopeless

 This is not what I signed up for when I married this man.  I do not know how we got to this place.  Our problems have increased gradually as our children (boys 11 and 15) have grown.  My husband is not only ADD but had a very dysfunctional home life as a child, especially with his mother.  I feel doomed.  He seems to not be able to separate his history from our home life.  I came from a very loving and supportive family.  Yet, we are repeating many of the patterns in his home.  I pay for his mother's sins every day of my life.  He pays little to no attention to me.  There is a double stand

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