Recent forum posts (all topics)

Okay, so 4 weeks ago (about) my husband tells me that he is miserable and if counseling doesn't work - he is leaving me.  2 weeks ago, he wants to sell our house and buy a new one together. He thinks that working from home rather than the office is a great idea - then he is reminded of when he did do that how unhappy he was to not have contact with others everyday.

My husband seems to take all things to the extreme. He was informed that forms of exercise help ADDer's  - okay great. Yeah, not so much. He apparently believes that this is a ticket to exercise all of the time, without regard to anyone else.  Normal people will exercise 4-5 times a week - fit it in during lunch breaks, before work, ect.  Not him - he will get home from work (late) eat his reserved dinner plate and head out.

My AD/ADHD husband is a musician and songwriter. After a couple of years urging him to get to play out, he finally got an opportunity to do a benefit performance at the local VA (he is a Vietnam vet who also suffers from PTSD, but that's another story....). After scrambling for hours before the performance that same evening to find everything he needed and get his gear in order, he admitted that he should never be so unprepared again and next time will be ready at least 2 days ahead of time.

After reading and learning, on this site and others, I understand the whole "now, not now" time frame ADDers operate from...

What I don't understand is how to live with it!?!?!?!

For example:

Does anyone have any experience with husband who wets the bed when he gets stressed out?  He has been diagnosed but hasn't started any meds and this has been going on for quite some time and he understandably doesn't want to talk to the doctor about it.  I know he is embarrassed by it but I'm not sure how I should handle it.

I think that I basicly 'get' most of the issues that come with ADD but not the lack of sex drive - interest.

Could some one please explain? 

I always thought that was a natural instinct in all men.  Not so, in my husband.

Shocked, wounded , confused, mislead, ripped off and very angry... from the wedding night forward.

I came into the marriage without a clue, this man had ADD or what that meant.  Wow, welcome to reality?

Is this a common trait amongst people w/ ADD?

I notice it with my s/o.  First it was through addictions: phone, internet, video games.  Now he physically wants to run away from his life.  To another state.  Why do they do this?  Running won't solve problems.  I should just let him go, right?  I am starting to suspect he's living a double life. 

Please share any similar experiences you have. 

Hi,

My husband was diagnosed with ADD as a child.  I strongly suspect he suffers from Adult ADD or ADHD.  He tells me his mind goes a million miles a minute, and I sense he is out of control.

He's been suffering from severe depression.  We have had major problems lately; spent some time apart.  It seems like things were improving.  However, he still has unresolved issues and a lot of resentment towards me.

Counseling has been great, but it's opened up deep wounds.  Some of the things that have surfaced I couldn't even connect the dots and wasn't aware of.  I feel like I've been duped, mislead, deceived by my ADHD husband.  I feel the man he was when we dated is NOT who he really was/is.  I realize that he did not do this intentionally and it was the hyperfocused phase and the illness, but I feel terrible, I feel mad, I feel like I gave up myself.

Hi. My husband and I started seeing a marriage counselor a couple of weeks ago do to a lack of trust with him that stems from a opiate addiction. He has been clean for almost 2 years now but our problems were continuing to go up. During our first session the counselor said my husband had add. I started reading and researching alot on adult add and have learned alot and we both are starting to learn new ways of being together. We have been married almost 13 years. Our son is 12 and was dx with adhd at 6. My daughter is 10 and was dx with autism at age 3.