Recent forum posts (all topics)

Seeking wise counsel

This is my first time ever writing to a forum. This will be a long, long post. It may not even be allowed.
 

I am so grateful for this site. I have been reading for about six months; you cannot know how valuable all of your sharing has been to me. I am writing because I am earnestly seeking sound advice on a situation in my life.
 

Almost two years ago, during the course of my job I met a charming and wonderful man. It turned out we had many shared acquaintances, We had a lot in common, including the fact we were both in AA.  

Should I stop trying to help him? (Not just ADHD)

Background: Hubby (42) has ADHD and anxiety (both only diagnosed 3 years ago, so lots of baggage too) as well as chronic pain and depression. I have been attending a Carer Support Group called GROW Better Together... based on the GROW program, but specifically for Mental Health Carers.

Please don't tell me this isn't just ADHD, I already know that. But ADHD and its late diagnosis is a major factor.

lying and secretiveness--can someone explain please????

I have been married for 15 years to an ADD husband.  He is medicated, we have been in counseling, not currently, but the counselor is kind of on "stand by"--we see her as needed.  Most of the time we do okay, but man the lying thing--WHAT IS THAT?!?!  Our whole married life, hubby lies about small stupid things.  He has always been terrible with money to the point that I took him off our accounts because he overdrew then, gave the debit card to a friend, etc., so he has his own account with a small amount of spending/gas money in it.  Guess what?  He overdrew that and there is no savings

I have two questions relating to relationships and ADHd

Ok, my first question is, is ADHD a genetically transfered condition?  For instance, my father just got out of prison about a month ago and my mom keeps saying, i just cannot believe how much alike you two are.  Well, we found out that i have adhd about a month or two ago and well, every thing makes since.  Plus every simpton that help guide listed, well, my mom said "baby, that describes you to a tee."  And that's what I thought, well I was like, holy s*** that's me!  And I guess you could look up adhd symtoms and helpguide, well ok it says ahda in child ren but its also for adults:

Are These Just Excuses?

My husband was diagnosed with ADHD about two years ago.  I have been doing a lot of research on the subject and know what most of the more "common" symptoms are but my husband blames EVERYTHING on ADHD and it has already gotten old.  He blames everything from being hungry, tired, hot or just about anything he could think of at the time for his bad behavior.  I know that these things can effect anyone to a certain degree but his behavior is extremely out of control. Could this really be because of ADHD or are these just excuses?

Expressing frustration without feeling guilty

I do not have ADHD, but my spouse does. He was diagnosed as an adult and he carries a huge burden with him of poor friend and family relationships - even though he is a smart, sincere, funny guy with a huge heart. I guess I saw these traits from the start and because I can do the organizing in the relationship I just sort of took on those responsibilities because he is very talented in other areas. These "other areas" do make up for what he can't do around the home... but sometimes I still get frustrated.

Fighting an Invisible Enemy

My husband and I have been married for 19 years.  But for the last 12 years he has not contributed financially to our family.  He quitted his job and started his own business.  We agreed to this new venture for two years.  The business did not take off.  He tried several other businesses after that.  Nothing really worked.  He seems to have a problem with clutters.  Our place is a two bedroom condo.  The second bedroom has always been used as his "office/storage" cluttered with boxes and stuff.  It is in complete disarray.  I am not allowed to organize anything in this room.  One day I disc

ADHD or just lazy????? I need to vent!

I am constantly resentful at my husband because he seems just downright lazy!  This evening I went to the grocery store since we have a busy weekend ahead of us and I wanted to get a jump start ....  I arrive back home with a trunk full of groceries, it's dark, there is construction of the curbs in front of our home so there is some ditches and gravel to navigate.  I open the door, no one is around - kids are in bed, husband is in the basement - in his "man cave" - watching TV.  I start bringing in the groceries, expecting that any minute he will walk up the stairs and start helping me ..

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