New, desperate, and in a lot of emotional pain -- ADHD husband also has depression & anxiety
Husband with ADHD plus anxiety and depression. Very Jekyll/Hyde. This is textbook ADHD -- he can't hold a job, bill payment and child care schedules are nonexistent, and he doesn't honour agreements. His cheques to me have bounced, and he is neglectful. He yells or raises his voice at me and our child, and treats me rudely. I've become a nag in response, which is not who I am, and I don't like it at all. He has a very kind 'core' and is known by others as a 'nice' guy. But he has no patience, is very triggered by his family of origin, and responds to me reactively as if I'm his mother or his sister, criticizing him. He loses jobs constantly, and has drained my significant retirement savings to almost nothing, and we've gone from earning over 100k to living under the poverty line. I have become an emotional wreck due to his ups and downs of mood, but feel trapped as I have no money to leave, and I'm afraid of his dysfunctional family, who have ostracized me and blamed me for DH's mental health issues, with which he was diagnosed years before he met me. At some level, I'm hoping for a miracle as I love him. But he'll never change, and I know this.