Recent forum posts (all topics)

DH finally went back to a dr. and got a script for Adderall (first try with a stimulant). He filled it right away and took the first one at work. I called him to see how it was going and he said a million times better. He had been having lots of anxiety from work about getting stuff done, which was probably due to not being able to focus on it. Yesterday (day 2), he was vague about the effectiveness. He said that he had to get a bunch of smaller tasks done, so he couldn't really tell if he was concentrating better. This morning (sat.) he is in true ADHD mode with 50 things going on.

Don't know where to begin, but need to get my feelings out before I implode. My husband and I have been married for 6 years, together for 8. I had ADHD as a child (back when we all just assumed that we outgrew it), then was diagnosed again when I was 25, a year into our relationship.

Conundrum;  A paradoxical, insoluble, or difficult problem; a dilemma:

I tend to start a new post only when I'm struggling.  And I tend to really struggle on the weekend.  Yeah, there's a connection.

A comment from a friend led me to re-read the comments people have posted in response to comments I've posted.  And that review led me to my journals.  And all this led me to realize the "nut" of my situation.

I'm at a complete loss on what to do w/my husband and marriage.  After 10 years of marriage, 2 beautiful girls, & so many endless unfinished projects, I just don't know how much more I can take.  I need some real, genuine advice, and I need it now.  

*bought a house 8 years ago...lived w/my Mom for 8 1/2 months while bedrooms/living room/dining room walls were ripped apart to the studs/floors ripped out/replaced. Mom hired contractor to finish drywall for us so we could move in.  The trim around entire inside of home is still in the box in the garage from 7+ years ago.

Yes, it's true, my 11 year long stretch of trying to determine and fix my husband's personality disorder has finally come to an end with a conclusion that I'm satisfied with stating is exactly the cause with no further doubt in my mind. 
I must however admit that the answer does not give me any comfort or hope that my marriage will get better, in fact it assures me that unless I do some soul searching of my own it will without doubt only get worse. 

My 8-year-old daughter talking to me  (non-ADHD spouse). "Mom, why are those neighbors so rich? Their mom doesn't work. 

I respond, "their dad has a job. " 

You're having a conversation with someone who has ADD and supposedly loves you.  You're telling them you're going through a very hard time in your life.  They say a few words, but sound bored, detached and show no emotion or interest.  A few minutes later they ask how someone is doing they barely know.  When they ask about this person they sound very interested and concerned, even sweet.  What is up with that? 

I wonder to myself, How does a good marriage keep it together and why doesn't mine feel good to me? I found the following on the internet.

I love my partner. I am madly in love with my partner. But the untreated ADD that she has is toxic. She recognises that her own worklife is affected, and admits that out of everyone in her life I am most hurt by it - but then, she'll take the meds to help her at uni, but not in general to help us out.

As I wrote in others post here, my marriage is improving and everything is going great. The only thing that keep me a kind of frustrated, although I have learned how to deal with it through the years, is that he lost his sex drive since we got married 6 years ago. We tried medications, therapy, doctors, but nothing helped him. I almost did everything to wake up his fire but nothing looks to help. He feels bad about this too, so, he avoid to talk about it. He's charming and shows me his love in many  other ways. We love each other and I have hope that one day he can get back his sex drive.